South Park High
by Kit K
Summary: The true story about the now teenage kids of South Park. Bad language(Fu-Shi-Bit, etc.), Sexual content. Recommended for 15 up.
1. Eight Long Years

Wow, I'm finally starting a fiction I'm gonna go through with…well, I'm Kyneron, and this is pretty much my first REAL fan fiction. I've submitted many others, but I always delete them in last minute because I freak out about how the outcome is gonna be (--'). Yeah. Well, the first chapter isn't that long, it's pretty much just to introduce…but there is a part in this chapter that will be part of a plot…but you won't find out what it is, yet! Muhahahahah!

Enter the lives of the sad, confused and hormone-invaded teenagers…of South Park.

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**Chapter One: Eight Long Years**

It's Sunday afternoon in South Park, a tiny, snow covered town in Colorado. My story begins in the house of a sixteen year old boy…

"Come on, it's starting!"

The rather husky teenager stumbled across in through the door, discarding his yellow backpack to the floor and took the yellow hat off his head and shook his head, his brown, short hair waving around as it had not been combed. He brushed a load of snow off his large, baggy red shirt onto the floor which was covered by a green, plastic rug. He glanced at a picture of himself at age eight. That was eight years ago, he reminisced as he kicked off his black shoes and brushed off the last snow on his brown pants and finally left the hall and entered the Living Room which was colored the same bright yellow on the walls as the rest of the house, except for the basement. His mother, who was dressed in a long, blue dress, was sitting on the brown and quite worn out couch. She looked like she was around her early thirties. She untied the string that kept her long, brown hair in a bun at the back of her head and let it hang freely. The door opened, and two more boys came in.

"Hold on, Cartman!" One of them called. They were both very similar in their build, except the one with the crimson hair that was combed back on his head was a bit taller. They looked like any average, sixteen year old teenagers. The one with the crimson hair threw his brown cloak and revealed his blue jacket and white shirt. He brushed some snow off his black pants and entered the Living Room. "Has it started yet?" He wondered, looking at the husky boy, Cartman, with his large, green eyes. "Hi, Mrs. Cartman." The woman smiled at the boy.

"Yeah, it's just beginning!" Cartman said, sitting down on the couch. "Come on, sit down, Jew boy!" Cartman said, smiling a little and patting on the seat next to him. When they were younger, Cartman had always taunted the crimson haired boy for his Jewish background, but as they grew older-even Cartman who was incredibly childish and evil-they grew out of their constant feuds and their friendship improved considerably.

"Hi Mrs. Cartman!" The last boy with jet black hair that reached down to his ears said. He wore a black shirt, a red vest and a pair of blue jeans, black socks on his feet. His blue eyes instantly became fixed on the TV that stood just a small distance in front of the couch as he sat down on the floor in front of the couch. They were watching a reality show about a group of people who lived together in a luxurious mansion on an island far out at sea, separated from all civilisation, living on the food sent in once a week. They had gathered to watch the last episode together. The people on the show were competing for five million dollars, and there were only three left.

Cartman looked around. "Hey Kyle, didn't you tell Kenny to get over here today?" The crimson haired boy, Kyle, nodded.

"Yes I did…he said he would be here after school, he just had to go home and do something…I don't kn-" Suddenly, the door flew open, and a boy ran inside, closing the door. He wore a white shirt and an orange parka with the hood down. However, the jacket seemed a bit small for him. He also wore a pair of blue jeans. He had dirty blonde, messy hair. He was a bit taller than the other boys, and he was a bit thinner as well.

"Hey guys!" He smiled. "Sorry about the bust in…Jimmy's new wheelchair is really good and fast, but his jokes are just as bad as ever…he really can steer a wheelchair through ice…" The boy said, smiling.

"Hi, Kenny." Stan called, still watching the TV. "Come on, it's already started!" They all sat there, watching the show.

After two hours, the show finally came to its last minutes. Cartman's mother was no longer in the Living Room, she had left and went to her bedroom to ´sleep, which Cartman called ´doing the goddamn rubber stick. Kenny sat on the couch now, and they watched in anticipation, waiting for the man to reveal who had won the great prize.

"And the winner with ten-thousand, three-hundred and forty-two votes is…Vera Barnagan!" He announced, and the screams and cheers of people were heard not only from the TV, but from people in the houses along the street outside who were also watching the popular show. Kenny stood up and cried out in joy while Stan frowned. Cartman didn't say or do anything as he had his mouth full of snacks from a green bag in his hand that said 'Cheesy Poofs' on it, but Kyle started dancing around, laughing.

"Yes! Two hundred dollars, two hundred dollars!" He chanted as he danced around. "Craig owes me money, Craig owes me money!"

Afterwards, the boys decided to play some of the video games from Cartman's vast collection of games. Kenny, Kyle and Stan were playing while Cartman ate his Cheesy Poofs and watched. "Hey, can I copy your notes for the Science test, Kyle?" He asked.

"No, you should have thought of that yourself, dumbass." Kyle answered, not paying much attention to the round boy who looked like he was about to blow a tantrum.

"Aye!" He exclaimed, his face becoming red.

"Well, I gotta go. As the big man himself once said…" Kenny pointed against the door. "Screw you guys, I'm-a goin' home." And with that, the blonde boy left the others. Soon, Stan and Kyle left as well. Cartman switched the channel and continued chomping down Cheesy Poofs.

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Tadaa? I guess that's the end of the first chapter, huh? Let me know if you like it…and if you don't, quote, you can suck my tiny balls. (Only a quote, don't get any ideas of the size, jackass…)


	2. Monday Always Begins With A Yawn

"I'm ba-aaaaack!"-Kyle Schwartz, Kyle's cousin. Okay, I've got a whole bunch of chapters already set up and ready to be released…but I can't put 'em all out at once 'cause that would spoil the fun, so I'm gonna put up just two today…but that does seem like a lot for just the first day…oh well. Okay, I'll answer reviews… 

sonekasoyer: Thanks, man. It's nice to hear some encouragement, my stinkin' friends are too frickin' self-centred to do give me some…and what kind of South Park High School story would it be without Wendy? ;) Oops, spoiler…oh well, it's not like it was that big a deal, huh?

By the way, I forgot the disclaimer last time: I don't own South Park, yattiyatta. However, if there is something that I do own, I will let you know, you stinkin' rascals.

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**Chapter Two: Monday Always Begins With A Yawn**

Kyle could hear his mother calling from downstairs. He threw off the blue covers on his bed and stepped out of it, yawning and stretching his arms. He was only wearing a pair of grey boxer shorts and a white shirt. The light of the morning sun shone in through the window, lighting up a spot on the blue floor. There were some pictures hung up on the purple walls, but only few. Kyle opened the brown wardrobe and picked out some clothes.

Kyle arrived in the kitchen downstairs, wearing a white shirt and a pair of navy blue pants. He sat down at the table with his father while his mother walked around the kitchen. His mother was a bit round and had large, red hair that somehow stood straight up like scarlet balls of hair placed on each other. She wore a brown tweed and a grey skirt. His father was reading a paper. He had black hair, but as he had grown older it was starting to become lighter. He wore a brown jacket, a green shirt and black pants. Kyle heard footsteps, and his little brother entered. His name was Ike, and he was actually adopted, originally born in Canada. He was too big now, but Kyle had remembered when they were younger that he used to play a game called Kick the Baby, and all he did basically was kick Ike so he flew away, and it often ended with a broken window. Ike was wearing a baggy, white shirt and grey jogging pants.

"Whoa! It's almost nine!" Kyle suddenly exclaimed as he noticed the clock.

"Yeah, I've been calling on you for a lot longer than it should take! What are you waiting for?" Kyle's mother, Sheila Broflovski, wondered, pointing at the two, buttered toasts and the slices of cheese on the plate on the table. Kyle quickly gulped down the food, and then he went to clean up. Afterwards, he got his green backpack, put on his black shoes and his orange jacket, and then he headed out of the house, not bothering to say good bye to his family. On his way out of the large, grey house, he put on a green beanie. He headed down to the street and headed upwards on it. All the houses on both sides of the street looked pretty much the same except for color and the size of the backyards. He finally arrived at a part of the street where there were no houses. The weather in the town he lived in was always cold or not so cold, but there was always a thick layer of snow everywhere. The trees in the area he was in right now were covered in snow, just like all the other trees in South Park. He arrived at a yellow Bus Stop sign. Cartman, Stan and Kenny were there, along with a couple of other kids. Cartman wore a black jacket, but the others wore the same as the day before.

"Hi guys." Kyle said.

"Hey, dude. What took you so long?" Stan wondered. Kyle shrugged and looked around.

"Slept too long…where's Craig?" Kyle answered and continued to search through the small crowd of people. He stopped and stared for a moment when he saw a pretty girl with chestnut brown hair who was wearing a white shirt, a blue blouse and a green, long skirt. Her name was Rebecca, and Kyle had been smitten with her ever since he first met her when they were eight. She was staring at the ground while nervously biting her lip and rolling her thumbs. She may have felt Kyle's eyes on her, as she turned. When she saw him, she smiled a little. He smiled back for a moment, but he then turned away when he felt his cheeks burning up.

"Hey, there's Craig and Clyde," Kyle heard Stan say. He saw where his best friend was pointing. It was up ahead of the road, where two boys were slowly coming their way. One of them wore a black shirt, a blue, puffy jacket with a yellow collar and black pants. He wore a blue hat on his head. Next to him was a boy who looked like him a lot. He had brown, messy hair and dark, brown eyes. He wore an open, brown jacket over his red shirt with a blue collar and a pair of blue jeans.

"Hey!" Kenny suddenly shouted, waving at them. They noticed him and both frowned, slowly walking over to them. He looked at the boy with the brown hair. "You owe me three-hundred bucks!" The others could see that Kenny was overjoyed. Kenny's family was very poor, and he had never had a large amount of money. Kyle was also demanding his money from the boy in the blue hat.

"Fine, here!" The brown-haired boy exclaimed after a long while of nagging, handing a bundle of dollar bills to Kenny. "Leave me alone now. Come on, Craig." He said to the boy in the blue hat, walking away. Craig gave Kyle his money and left as well.

"Sweet…sweet!" Kenny exclaimed, staring at the money.

"What are you guys gonna do with the money?" Stan wondered.

"I'm gonna buy some new clothes, and after that, I'm gonna save my money at a safe place," Kenny said. He obviously had something planned for the money. Kyle, however, merely shrugged and shook his head.

"I don't know what I'm gonna do with it…actually, I don't really need it," Kyle said. He stared at the money for a moment, and then, to his own surprise, he handed it to Kenny. "You take it." Kenny took the money and stared at Kyle.

"Whoa, thanks," Kenny whispered, overwhelmed with joy.

"Dude, you're a fucking idiot," Cartman scoffed, laughing. Suddenly, a yellow school bus zoomed up the road, the engine roaring as it drove in top speed. It made a complete halt at the bus stop, and the door opened. The bus driver was a young man with black, long hair. He wore a blue suit and a blue hat. His eyelids were hanging, a tired smile on his face.

"Get on, kids…" He said, smiling a little. People started getting on the bus. The four boys took the five seats that were placed in a row at the end of the bus. They all sighed when the last boy who got on the bus noticed that most seats were taken. He was a thin boy who looked a bit scrawnier and weaker than the other boys. He wore a blue shirt and a green vest as well as a pair of blue jeans. He nervously moved across the bus, sometimes scratching his yellow, messy hair. He noticed the seat next to Kenny, smiling weakly, as if he was about to start pleading for something.

"He-he-hello f-fellas…mind if I sit next to you, K-K-Kenny?" He stuttered, looking at Kenny. Cartman closed his eyes and started to whisper quietly, as if he was praying.

"Well…go ahead, Butters," Kenny said, smiling. The boy, Butters, smiled and jumped up on the seat at the left window.

"Th-thanks, K-Kenny…that's awful n-n-nice of you." Butters had always been teased and pushed around by everyone else, mostly because of his stuttering, his weak and cowardly persona and his tendency to be a sycophant. However, lately, people had gotten tired of messing with him, since he had started to stand up for himself more often. Kenny had always been kind to Butters, since he knew that if he was in Butters's seat, he would have wanted to be treated kindly.

Stan stared out the right window. Kyle who was sitting next to him was quietly staring at the top of Rebecca's head a few seats ahead, smiling weakly. Cartman was just sitting there, staring into nothingness. The bus suddenly stopped, and it took a long time for anyone in the back to see who was getting on. They could hear groans and shouts, but after a while, they saw a wheelchair be pushed on. Sitting on it was a boy who obviously had a dysfunctional brain. He wore a large, baggy, red shirt like Cartman and a pair of black pants that were a bit too large for him. He had an abnormally large head, with short, blonde hair that had a ting of orange in it. He smiled widely, looking around. He pushed the little lever on his wheelchair and it turned. Then, he moved across the bus, over to the end, just in front of the boys. He stopped there and turned forward.

"Timmy!" He exclaimed, and the bus soon started driving again. The wheelchair almost fell when the bus zoomed off. "Timmy!" The boy shouted again.

"Shut up, Timmy!" Cartman exclaimed.

"TIMMY!" Timmy shouted again. After that, he fell silent, his smile fading. "Ti-Timmy…" He whispered sometimes. Everyone was quiet under the whole bus ride. After a while, the bus stopped again. A boy got on the bus, his left eye closed and the right one staring from left to right over and over. He looked terrified. He wore a black jacket and dark green jeans. He held a mug with a red lid on it in his hand and a backpack over the shoulder.

"Man, school again! It is just way to much pressure!" He said loudly. He took a sip of coffee, and he started to calm down. Since there were no seats in the front that were empty, he went to the end and sat down on the seat in front of Timmy. He had blonde hair that stood out in every direction. His name was Tweek. The reason to why he was acting so strange, flinching, shaking and randomly squealing was because he drank too much coffee. His parents owned a coffee shop in town, so that was probably the source of his addiction.

The bus stopped soon after it had started. This time, a lot of the kids turned their heads against the entrance and started whispering to each other. A girl entered.

"Whoa!" Stan exclaimed. The girl had long, blonde hair. She wore a red shirt, a purple blouse, a purple, knee-long skirt and on her head was a purple beret. Her eyes were a deep, dark brown color. She looked around smiling. She walked down the bus, stopped, and sat down next to Tweek.

"Hi Tweek." She said with her soft, light voice. Tweek started sweating, shaking furiously.

"Oh man! This is WAY too much pressure!" He shouted, not able to stop shaking. He gulped down his entire mug of coffee and fell asleep, his mouth wide open. The girl laughed a little. Clyde leaned back over his seat and looked at the girl.

"Hey Wendy! When did you color your hair?" He asked. Wendy smiled.

"Saturday! Do you like it?" Wendy wondered, leaning back in her seat.

"Yeah, looks great!" Clyde answered. "Well, see ya!" He then turned back and sat down. Stan had been sitting there, gaping the whole time while his eyes were fixed on Wendy. The two of them had been a couple when they were younger but they broke up when Wendy started cheating on him. However, she had stopped going out with others completely. Cartman, as well, was sometimes turning his gaze against her, although trying his best not to. When they were younger, Wendy had attained feelings for Cartman too, but it turned out to be sexual tension which was released with a public kiss. However, Cartman's feelings for her had always been deeper than hers for him, but he had kept it hidden from everyone around, especially his friends, since he was afraid Stan would abandon him, and if he did, Kyle and Kenny would surely do the same. He had never had a best friend, a person who he could rely on no matter what, so he had always tried to keep his friendships intact and sometimes he had been forced to patch them up after one of his terrible pranks.

Stan gasped as Wendy leaned out and turned her head against him. "Hi Stan." She said. Stan stared at her, at a loss of words.

"H-h-h-hi W-W-We-Wen-Wend-d-d-y." He answered, stuttering worse than even Butters did. Wendy laughed a little and leaned back to her seat. Stan sighed.

"Dude, you're her bitch," Cartman remarked, grinning. Kyle and Kenny laughed, and Stan glared at them. Kenny shrugged and Kyle looked back.

"Well, there's some truth in it!" He said.

"Whatever, dude."

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The bus ride went on quietly, and only two more entered afterwards. First was a pretty girl with curly, blonde hair named Bebe who wore a red tank top and a pair of blue jeans. When she entered, Kenny whispered, "Boob alert, boob alert," grinning widely. The last one to board the bus was a handicapped boy, Jimmy. He had brown, messy hair and walked around with two crutches, his legs disfigured. He wore a pair of baggy, brown pants and a green, large shirt. He sat down on a seat next to a window. Finally, the bus stopped.

"Arrival!" The bus driver shouted loudly. Everyone started streaming out of the bus. Once the bus left, they headed over the street. There were no private domains nearby because a large piece of land was taken up by the school. It was the three buildings that made the complete school. There was a brown, brick wall, green roof, square building with a shorter but longer and rectangular building on the right of it. On the left, there was a smaller building with a green roof. On the front of the school, the schoolyard was located. The kids headed over the street and walked through the schoolyard where the ground was made of stone cobble roads with sets of swings and benches placed out here and there. There were two entrances, a large one on the front of the largest building and a smaller entrance on the rectangular building. Hanging over the large entrance was a bronze sign with silver letters on it. 'South Park High' it spelled out. The kids walked through the doors and entered the school.

They entered a long, wide hall with red walls. There were blue lockers lined up on the walls, occasionally separated by a space on the wall where there was a door. There was a staircase in the middle of the hall that led up to the second floor. The hall was crowded with students. The kids had begun High School a term ago, and they were in the middle of the winter term. Stan, Kyle, Cartman and Kenny headed down the hall to the end. They headed into their main classroom through a blue door.

Their main classroom was of average size for a classroom. The walls were turquoise with grey spots here and there. The floor consisted of blue tiles. Instead of the small, individual desks which they had been using through Elementary School, there were instead five large tables, five chairs around each one. Butters, Tweek, Timmy, Wendy and Bebe were already in the classroom, spread out. Butters and Tweek were sitting together at one of the two tables that were at the front of the classroom, Wendy and Bebe on the other one. Timmy was rolling around the classroom, sometimes exclaiming his name and laughing. There were brown bookcases along the back wall in the back of the room. The boys sat down at a table in the back of the classroom. Soon, more and more of their classmates entered. Timmy had pushed away the remaining chair at the boy's table and taken that spot, much to their displeasure. Everyone who they knew was in the classroom, but there were still four chairs open. Soon, Rebecca entered. She looked around for a while until she noticed that Wendy was waving to her, indicating that she should sit down with her. Rebecca did so and smiled nervously as she sat with the other two girls. Soon, another girl entered, and after that, the only black child in South Park entered, a boy named Token. He wore his favorite shirt a purple, shirt with a golden T on it and black pants. Through the years, he had developed an averagely large, black afro and he always had a comb in his pocket. He sat down with Craig, Clyde and Jimmy.

"Aren't we going to begin soon!" Kyle exclaimed. As if on cue, the door opened, and two men entered. One of them was wearing a black, leather vest, black leather pants and a black, leather hat. He had a brown mustache. He sat down on a chair next to the teacher's desk. The other man was a man around his forties. He had gray, thin hair. What was so surprising about him was the fact that he dressed like a woman. He wore a green dress and had pink lipstick. He had pair of glasses as well. His name was Mr. Garrison. Mr. Garrison had gone through a sex change years ago, and the other man was a man called Mr. Slave, who was Mr. Garrison's partner, or slave, or whatever he was. Mr. Garrison and Mr. Slave had been separated for a few years but later got back together as whatever they were. Mr. Garrison had been most of the children's teacher throughout Elementary School, and due to his lack of teaching abilities it was a terrible surprise when they found out that he was going to be their History teacher during High School, since he very often insulted people and was rude.

"Okay, students, we're gonna have roll call first. I'll just pick some names on random…Rebecca?"

"H-here…"

"Jimmy?"

"He…he…he-he…he-" Mr. Garrison cut Jimmy off, obviously not feeling like waiting for him to finish.

"Kyle?"

"Here."

"Pip?"

"Present!" A blonde boy sitting with Tweek and Butters called out.

"Bebe?"

"Here!"

"Craig?"

"I'm sorry, but he's at a business meeting," Craig said. A few laughed at his joke.

"Token?"

"Present."

"Timmy?"

"TIMMY!" Timmy shouted.

"Jesus, take it easy with the sugar, Timmy…Clyde?"

"Here."

"Wendy?"

"Here."

"Fatass?"

"AYE!"

"Kenny?"

"Here."

"Butters."

"Here, siree-o!"

"Hah! Tweek?"

"I'm here! I'm here!"

"Stan?"

"Here."

Once he finished checking attendance, Mr. Garrison started writing on the black board, expecting the kids to take notes on their books. Kyle was always working fully concentrated, motivated to do his best. But today, he was just busy with staring at Rebecca. Stan noticed this and laughed a little.

"Wow, you're really fallen for her," he said, waving his hand in front of Kyle's face to get his attention. Kyle glared at him.

"Shut up, barf boy." He replied, remarking on the times when Stan had vomited whenever Wendy even spoke to him. Cartman was just sitting there, his head leaning in his hand. Kenny was working hard, trying to do his best. "God, this is boring…" Kyle mumbled.

"I heard Craig's having a party again on Friday. Should we go?" Stan whispered. Craig was known as the party king of South Park, always throwing the best parties since his parents were often out of town. Kyle wasn't sure though; Craig's parties were a lot of fun, but they often got out of hand. However, when Stan said that he could ask Rebecca to go with him, he became more enthusiastic with the suggestion. Cartman didn't really care, and Kenny said he would do anything if it could lead to him, quote, ´getting some nookie.

After class, the boys got their math books, getting ready for their next class with Mrs. Jenkins. They were standing in the hall, talking about what to do after school when Wendy, Bebe and two other girls walked over to them.

"Hi guys!" Bebe said, smiling and leaning forward a little. "How's it going?"

"Fine, thanks!" Kenny answered, smiling back. He stared at Bebe the whole time.

"Are you guys going to Craig's party on Friday?" Wendy wondered. When she stepped to the left, moving a little against Cartman, he started sweating. He pulled down his yellow hat a little so no one would notice.

"Eh, yeah, we're going," Stan replied. "Are you?"

"Yeah."

"So…I guess we'll see ya there." He added. Wendy nodded, smiling. She then looked at Cartman.

"Well, you're awful quiet lately!" She said in a joking kind of way. Cartman was thinking of something to say. He was at the same time trying to smile, but the nervousness made it look like he was imitating Elvis.

"We-well…stuff…swallowing glue." He stuttered. Everyone stared at him, confused. "Nothing." He quickly said, staring at the floor. Kyle heard him mutter something that sounded like ´fucking piece of shit. The girls then left, giggling quietly, whispering to each other.

"What was that, fatass?" Kyle wondered, staring at Cartman with a confused face. Cartman looked like he was about to say something insulting, but instead, he just looked back at the floor and walked away. The boys watched him walk away, hazing his feet across the floor. "That was weird."

"Goddamn it, that Bebe has boobs the size of melons…" Kenny stared at the girls as they walked away. "I'd like to slam my dick up that-"

"Okay, we're gonna miss class." Stan exclaimed, tired of listening to Kenny's perverted comments.

The boys headed to a classroom on the above floor. It looked the same as their main classroom, except there were three lines of white tables instead of groups of tables. Stan, Kyle and Kenny sat in the far right of the back row. All three of them had trouble hearing what the old teacher, Mrs. Jenkins, as they were all busy staring at the girls. Kyle looked up and noticed Cartman sneaking into the classroom as quietly as possible so Mrs. Jenkins wouldn't know he was late. He managed to get to the back row and to his three friends unnoticed, even though his footsteps were loud and heavy.

"Where were you?" Kyle asked, looking away from Rebecca who was sitting in the front row with the other girls.

"Just out…nothing special." Cartman replied, shrugging. Suddenly, Tweek stood up, twitching and trembling.

"Oh man! This is way too much pressure!" He shouted, jerking his head from left to right, his eyes closed tightly. Mrs. Jenkins turned around and looked at Tweek. She had always had some sort of affection to him, obviously feeling sorry for his addiction.

"Calm down, Tweek…just sit down and drink your coffee, and then we'll slow down, okay?" She suggested. Tweek slowly nodded, although it looked more than a twitch, and then he sat down, squealing quietly. Butters who sat next to him patted Tweek's shoulder, and at first, the troubled boy flinched in fright, but when he noticed it was Butters, he calmed down a little. Craig, Clyde and Token were laughing a little, trying to muffle their voices with their hands. Mrs. Jenkins continued her lecturing.

"Hey, do you think Wendy will say yes if I ask her to the party?" Stan asked Kyle, a longing look on his face. Cartman reacted to this by raising his head and staring forward into nothingness, his ears picking up every word that was uttered from Stanley's lips.

"Yeah, probably…she's obviously got something for you," Kyle reassured, smiling. "Just ask her." Cartman looked at Stan. Stan looked back at him.

"What?" He wondered. Cartman stared at him for a long while.

"Nothing." The large boy then whispered and turned back to writing down what Mrs. Jenkins was saying, even though he had a hard time understanding half of it. Cartman had never been the most intelligent person, like Kyle, his intelligence was not in books and facts; he had what he liked to call ´street smarts. That means he was an expert in the arts of lying, deceiving and cheating.

The rest of the day was quite dull. Up until the lunch break, that is.

The rectangular building was used as the lunch area. It was large and had no walls. The walls were green, with large, metal, grey tables placed out on different spots. At the front of the large room, there was a big counter with grey bowls of food placed inside the counter itself. A black, slightly husky man wearing a large, green shirt and black pants with a chef's hat on his head served food to the kids. His name was actually Chef, and he had worked as chef at the Elementary School. But when the boys and the rest of their class left for High School, he started missing them, and so, he got a job as chef at the High School.

Stan, Kenny, Cartman and Kyle arrived in front of Chef. Stan handed in some pennies and smiled.

"Hey kids," Chef said with his dark, calm voice, smiling back.

"Hey Chef." The boys responded simultaneously.

"Everything okay?" He asked. Kenny, Kyle and Stan nodded and took their food, leaving Cartman. However, Cartman stared at his feet. "Are you ok, Eric?" Chef wondered while serving some kids food. Cartman was a bit slow to realize Chef had said something to him, since he wasn't used to being addressed to with his first name by his friends.

"You know a lot about love and women and that crap, right?" Cartman asked. Chef laughed a little.

"Sure, Eric. What's the problem?"

"Well…this friend of mine likes this girl, but my other friend likes her too, but my first friend liked her first…what should my second friend do?" Chef looked like he suspected that Cartman was the second friend, but he nodded a little instead of saying anything about it.

"Well, that is a tricky situation…well; I think that…your friend…should talk to your first friend about it," Chef said. Cartman was at first a bit surprised, and then almost angry. He could have figured that out, but he wouldn't be stupid enough to actually risk his friendship with Stan over a girl! Cartman thanked Chef hurriedly and got his food, leaving. Once he found his friends, he sat down next to Kenny.

"Bullshit!" He suddenly exclaimed, making his friends jump up a little.

"What the hell!" Kenny said and glared at Cartman.

"What's wrong, man?" Stan wondered. At first, Cartman felt like doing as Chef had suggested, but instead, he glared at Stan.

"Fuck. Off." He scowled. Stan was taken aback. He looked back at his food, a bit hurt. Cartman shook his head. "Sorry." He mumbled. Stan shrugged.

"Whatever, that's cool," he replied, trying not to care very much. Kenny sighed.

"For god's sakes, if you like her so much, just go ask!" He exclaimed. He was referring to Kyle's never-ending gaze on Rebecca, who was sitting with Wendy and Bebe at a table not far away. He admired and loved every aspect of her features: her sparkling, brown eyes, the long, wavy, brown hair, her beautiful, yet nervous smile. Kyle nodded and looked at Kenny.

"You know what, you're right! I'll just go over there and ask her if she wants to be my date for the party!" Kyle said as his confidence and bravery pumping up. He took a deep breath and stood up. "Here goes nothing!" He marched over to Rebecca. Once he arrived to the girl's table, he just stood there. Wendy and Bebe stared at him, as did Rebecca. His mouth was opening and shutting, his confidence and bravery now worth as much as dust.

"Yes?" Rebecca finally said with a wondering look. Kyle finally closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"Will you be my date at Craig's party!" He then shouted, his eyes still closed. Practically every single pair of eyes had turned against Kyle now as he stood there with his eyes closed and his arms flat at his sides, his whole back stiff. Slowly, laughs started bubbling up, taunting laughs. Rebecca, however, didn't laugh or smile, she just rolled her thumbs, her cheeks a deep red. Wendy and Bebe giggled and gazed at Kyle, apparently admiring his courage. Finally, once the laughs subsided, Rebecca answered.

"Um…well, sure…I guess." Kyle slowly opened one of his eyes, followed by opening the other one. He slowly started breathing again, a tingling sensation in his stomach.

"Sh-sh-should I p-p-p-p-pick you up at ei-eight-t-t-t-t?" He stuttered. Rebecca nodded, a warm smile appearing on her face. Kyle nodded. "See you, then…" He finally mumbled and walked off, his spine and arms completely stiff. He sat down at his seat again and sighed, letting all the tension flow away.

"Great job, man!" Stan said, patting his friend's back, laughing at the same time. Cartman, however, was staring at Kyle, his lips thin. He was jealous of him. He couldn't understand how Kyle could ever have the courage to say something like that to anyone. He wished he had that courage. So he could tell Stan.

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w00t, who let the second chapter out! Who, who, who, who-who! Yay, my second chappie! You better like it, or I'll kick you in the nuts…by the way, wanna Roshamboo for reviews? HAH! Guess I won, you son of a person I don't know but I'm gonna call her a biatch anyway. You heard me.


	3. Confessions

"Hoooowdy-ho!"-Mr. Hankey. I got the third chapter right here…I wasn't able to put it up for a while 'cause every time I tried to log in, the browser said that the server was overloaded…goddamn it. Oh well, reviewing answering and the such and such.

Link Kiprusoff: Thanks a lot, dude. It's nice when people criticize on specific things…it's real nice.

Yeah…review-s- huh? Oh well, the fun of writing is motivation enough…for now(dudududuuuu!) Oh, by the way. If you see someone say something that has bad grammar in it, it's not a mistake. I only make the people say what a person would say in real life…example: "I and my friends are going to the arcade." "Me and my friends going to the arcade." Not much of a change, but still more realistic…just a little note. Well, enough stalling…

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**Chapter Three: Confessions**

When school finally ended, the kids streamed out of it, running and laughing, happy that they were finally free. The boys, accompanied by Timmy and Butters, were heading down the street, heading back home. Soon, Butters left them as he arrived at his place, but Timmy continued to follow them.

"So, are you asking someone to go with you to the party, Kenny?" Stan wondered as he kicked some snow out of the way.

"Anyone with big boobs. Preferably Bebe." Kenny took a breath and was just about to start talking about Bebe's breasts when he was interrupted by Cartman's heavy sigh.

"What is up with you lately?" Kyle wondered, this time with a tone of irritation.

"Oh, nothing…" Cartman muttered, sighing again. Kyle shrugged. He would probably never be able to completely understand the mystery that is Eric Cartman's psyche. Finally, with a last, loud "TIMMY!", Timmy left the boys and rolled off against his house. Stan left them soon, as well. Kyle waved to his friend one last time as he entered his house. Cartman glanced at Kenny and rubbed his eyes, trying not to make the tears that formed as the wind hit his eyes run down his cheeks. He then focused his sight on the orange-hooded boy. He thought about telling Kenny. Kenny had always been his best friend, or the best friend that a person like Cartman can have out of the small group of friends he had. He had always trusted his deepest secrets to him, even though they mostly were secrets about his fantastic plans to earn money and become famous. He took a small breath.

"Kenny…" Kenny looked up.

"Yeah?"

"You wanna sleep over at my place?" Cartman said, suddenly feeling that this was not the time. Instead, he made this proposal to improvise…or compensate, or whatever the confused boy was trying to do. "Free food and a warm floor…"

"Yeah, sure! Whatever that keeps me from having to go home to the stupid family…fucking lazy ass sons a bitches…" Kenny said, his smile suddenly changing into a dark frown, his eyes staring forward. They headed over to Cartman's large, green house. Once they entered, it didn't take long until Cartman heard his mother's voice.

"Snookums? Is that you?" She called from the kitchen. "I made a strawberry cake just for you!" Cartman smiled and called back.

"Thanks, mooom! But I'll take some Cheesy Poofs, Kenny is here! And being the poor ass bastard he is he might need the cake more than me!" Kenny shot a glare at Cartman, shortly followed by a look as if he thought ´well, I guess he's right about the poor part. Soon, Mrs. Cartman came into the hall, carrying a plate with a cake on it, three strawberries on the frosty topping. At first, Cartman regretted giving up the cake to his friend, but when he saw the bag of Cheesy Poofs, he shrugged and grabbed them instead. After that, the two boys headed up the stairs to Cartman's room.

The walls in Cartman's were purple. There was a wooden wardrobe, a bed with green and white covers and a window with white, short curtains hanging from it. There were posters of Terrance and Philip, the actors whom all the kids had idolized when they were younger, never missing their shows filled with fart jokes and idiotic comedy. He had bought a small TV at a garage sale which he had placed on a small table in front of his bed. He even had one of his game consoles, an Okama Gamesphere 2000, up there together with two controllers. Kenny started playing the Okama Gamesphere.

"Okay, spill it. What is the real reason you asked me to stay over?" Kenny said, not looking at Cartman but staring at the TV while biting his lip. Cartman stared at him for a long time. At first, he was a little angered that he couldn't ask his friend to stay over without being accused of lying. But then, he was a bit happy that he had a friend that knew him so well. He sat down on the floor and took a deep breath. All his thoughts of kissing Wendy once again, hugging her, just touching her sleek, beautiful skin flashed through his mind during that short moment.

"I sorta have…like…feelings for a girl…" Cartman slowly announced, his voice low and quiet. Kenny smiled and stared at Cartman.

"Oooh, the buff boy's hot for a chick, huh? Anyone I know?" Kenny wondered, leaning forward as he sat on the side of the bed. Cartman felt a feeling of guilt, a feeling that his feelings, although deep and loving, were disgusting and wrong.

"Testaburger." He then said rapidly. Kenny continued to smile as if he hadn't completely processed what Cartman said through his system. Then, after a second, he frowned.

"Testaburger? Wendy Testaburger? You mean Stan's ex?" Kenny wondered, his facial expression changing to awestruck. Cartman slowly nodded, making Kenny gasp and lean back. "Shit. You haven't told Stan, have you?"

"Of course not, you dipshit!" Cartman roared, as if it was the clearest thing ever. Kenny winced and he started feeling sorry for Cartman. He though, no, he knew that Cartman was a great guy and that he did deserve to have at least one real love of his love. But at the same time, he knew that Cartman couldn't compete with Stan for a girl's heart, especially if that girl was Wendy, a girl who had been smitten with Stan Marsh since second grade. He sat down next to his chubby friend and patted his shoulder.

"We'll figure something out, man…we'll figure something out…" He said with a concerned voice.

Stan's family consisted of five members; Stan himself, his mother Sharon, his father Randy, his grandfather and his sister Shelley. Sharon looked like any woman in her late thirties, with short, brown hair, a brown shirt and a black, long skirt. She had shining blue eyes which Stan had inherited. Randy was around his forties, had black, short hair and a black mustache. His eyes were a deep brown. He wore a white sweater and blue jeans. Sheila was nineteen years old now, and she went to college. She had brown, long hair and brown eyes like her father and she wore a pink shirt and red pants at the moment. When she was younger, she had very large braces that had wires going around the midsection of her head. But she didn't have those now, and without them, she was quite pretty, and she didn't have to take pauses when she spoke to suck her saliva. Stan's grandfather who was merely called Grandpa was very old now, and he didn't seem to ever die. He often tried to make suicide, but it always failed, and no matter how much he pleaded, no one wanted to kill him and ´put him out of his misery. He had a shriveled old face and hands, and he always wore a dark red sweater and blue jeans, riding around in a wheelchair. He also had the odd habit of calling both his son and his grandson Billy.

The family was sitting in the purple-wall diner room around the brown wooden table, two large plates and a bowl in the middle of the table. There was a freshly warmed up chicken, a pile of potatoes and a bowl of gravy. Stan wasn't able to eat; he just poked the food on his plate. His thoughts were somewhere else, namely with Wendy Testaburger. He knew that if he even tried to sink some food into his stomach, he would throw up. Not just because of his sensitive stomach but also of the tingling butterflies inside him. The rest of the family, however, ate rapidly and in large amounts. Especially Grandpa, who tried to eat as large pieces of potato and chicken as possible, hoping that he would choke. Sharon noticed her son and became concerned.

"Is everything alright, Stan, honey?" She asked with a concerned expression. Stan nodded, smiling vaguely.

"I'm okay, I'm just not hungry." Stan lied and tried to smile so his mother wouldn't be worried. Sharon nodded.

"If you want to, you can go and do something and then eat later if you get hungry, okay?" Stan nodded and stood up, leaving the table. He headed up the stairs to his room.

The walls in his room were purple as well. He had the usual stuff like a bed, a wardrobe, two windows and posters on the walls. Just like Cartman, his posters portrayed Terrance and Philip too. He tossed himself onto his bed and lied there with his face down. A thousand thoughts ran through his head, all of them related to Wendy somehow.

He thought about the first time Wendy had kissed him. It was after they had stopped aliens from taking all the cows from South Park. Of course, he threw up instantly after that, but Wendy was too happy to mind. Then he thought about the first time when Wendy had even said something to him and he hadn't thrown up. It was when South Park held a film festival and Wendy invited him to watch an independent movie with her. Actually, it was thanks to Cartman that he hadn't thrown up. He had imitated Wendy inviting him with a squeaky voice which made Stan feel a bit more comfortable. Then, when he thought about Cartman and Wendy at the same time, he thought about the time that almost half of South Park had witnessed Wendy give Cartman a long kiss in the middle of a debate about the subject of changing South Park's flag. Stan had felt terrible for weeks after that thanks to Cartman bragging about it throughout the whole debate. However, it didn't seem like Wendy cared for Cartman anyway, she had told him it was just sexual tension. But he still wondered, if it was sexual tension, why didn't Wendy just kiss him instead of Cartman. But none of that mattered now.

He had never been very angry with Wendy for cheating on him, but he had still been quite hurt. But now, she seemed like she had bettered in her ways and his feelings for her started to restore.

He laid there in his bed, smiling to himself. He definitely looked forward to the party on Friday, but there was still the matter of asking Wendy out.

The following days were pretty normal, except for Cartman's odd behavior every time Wendy's name was mentioned, and even worse, when she was nearby. Finally, on Thursday after school, Stan decided it was time to ask Wendy to the party. They were out on the school yard as all the students left to go home, waiting for Wendy and her friends to come. After a while, they did. The others watched as Stan walked over to Wendy and they exchanged some words. Once he came back, he shrugged.

"Well, that wasn't too hard." He said, his eyelids lowered and with a dreamy smile on his face. Kenny glanced at Cartman, who was staring at the ground. He felt sympathy for him, but he tried to hide it so the others wouldn't notice anything. The boys finally left to go home.

Cartman had invited Kenny to sleep over again. It was late at night when they were getting ready to go sleep. Kenny had borrowed Cartman's yellow sleeping bag, and he was lying in it, waiting for Cartman to come back from the bathroom. Once he did, he wore a pair of grey boxer shorts and a white shirt that was getting a bit small for him, since the bottom of his large belly hung out. He got into his bed once he had put out the lights. Kenny could hear his heavy breaths, staring at the purple ceiling.

"Kenny…"

"Yeah?"

"Even if she didn't like Stan...do you think I would've had a chance with her?" Cartman had stopped breathing. Kenny wasn't sure what to say. He knew Wendy wasn't that shallow, but Cartman wasn't exactly amazing with the ladies. He thought for a long moment, and he finally took a deep breath.

"Well, Cartman, I don't know…but if you wouldn't, I think it would have been Wendy who's missing out on being with a great guy."

Cartman was happy that Kenny was his friend. However, he hoped that one day, he would have someone who was something else than a friend.

School on Friday was wonderful for some, unbearable for others. It seems that everyone was going to Craig's party, and everyone was pretty much the whole school. Even people like Timmy were going, and even he seemed to have more luck with the ladies than Cartman did. Actually, he had more luck with the ladies than anyone else in general, as he was seen riding through the halls with a gold-colored cape with white fur on the edges, groups of girls following him, giggling and admiring Timmy. It was quite annoying to all the boys, but nonetheless, everyone seemed to have a date except Cartman. Even Kenny had managed to get Bebe to go with him, even though she was very shallow and seemed to be one of the many people who mocked Kenny for being poor.

The last class for the day was History with Mr. Garrison. No one was paying attention to the teacher; they were either talking about the party or just not listening. The boys sat in their usual seats in the back. Someone laughed out loud for the fourth time, and this time, Mr. Garrison sighed and put down his chalk pen. No one noticed that he turned around and glared at the class for a moment before taking a deep breath.

"Unless you want Mr. Slave to go get whip for me, you all better shut up." The transvestite said, making the whole class fall silent. An unpleasant smile spread across Mr. Garrison's face. "Okay, now." He continued lecturing, and slowly, the discrete whispers and notes started going around again.

"Hey, Cartman, you got a date for tonight?" Stan asked, leaning against Cartman. Kenny-who sat on Cartman's other side-frowned and put his head in his right hand.

"No, I don't." Cartman answered, staring at the blackboard.

"Well, who are you gonna ask? Are you gonna ask someone?" Cartman didn't answer. "Cartman, are even going?" Cartman hadn't planned on going, and nothing seemed to make him change his mind. He saw no reason to go to the party.

"Fuck that." He muttered. Stan gaped.

"Come on, you gotta go! Everyone's gonna be there!" He said, trying to convince Cartman. Cartman's face was slowly getting redder every moment that Stan spoke. "It won't be the same without you!"

"I said: FUCK THAT!" Cartman shrieked. He then stood up and stormed out of the classroom, knocking over two chairs on the way.

He stumbled out into the hall and tried to run as fast as he could, even though his run could be considered a jog for a fit person. Finally, he slowed down and sat down by the wall close to the entrance. He stared down at the ground. He tried to pull up his knees so he could hide his face, but his large torso blocked his legs. So he put his chin on his hand and stared at a spot on the floor a few feet away. He heard foot steps.

"Eric? Are you okay?" Cartman didn't look up. He could recognize the voice. It was Wendy, but she wasn't alone. He could hear Butters stutter something quietly, and soon, he saw Kenny's orange jacket in the right corner of his eye as he sat down next to Cartman. Soon, Wendy sat down next to him. Cartman realized that probably half of the class was surrounding him, as the spot on the floor he had been staring at was now blocked by the vision of Pip's red loafers and his green pants from the knees down. He finally looked up gazed around him. He was right when he had assumed the amount of people.

"What the fuck do you people want!" He hissed, glaring at his classmates. Some had wondered what was wrong, and some were ready to comfort him, but when he said this, most frowned and left to go back to class. Soon, only Kenny and Wendy were left. "Whythe fuck are you here?" Cartman muttered to the two kids sitting beside him.

"What's wrong, Eric?" Wendy said, patting Cartman on his shoulder. Kenny glanced at Wendy, concerned how Cartman would react. "Come on, talk to me." Cartman shivered and then stared at Wendy. Right into her large, brown eyes. He felt his envy and anger gradually disappear to be replaced by the familiar, tingling sensation all throughout his body. He opened his mouth and tried to say something, but as he did, Wendy smiled, which made him even more nervous. Then, his hand started shaking a little, and his face became red.

"You know what, I'll talk to him, and you'll go tell Mr. Garrison that Cartman just isn't feeling very good right now. Oh, and tell Stan and Kyle to get our stuff." Kenny said, deciding it was time to help his friend out. Wendy nodded and stood up, heading back to the classroom. Kenny stood up as well, helping Cartman to his feet. "Come on, man. Mr. Garrison won't mind if we leave a bit earlier." And with that, the two left the school.

They decided not to go to Cartman's home, but instead, to one of the boy's favorite spot. It was a small clearing not far from Stan's home. It was called Starks Pond. The two boys sat down by the pond in the middle of the clearing. There were a few, tiny pieces of ice floating around. They sat there quietly for a long moment until Cartman spoke up.

"What am I supposed to do, Kenny! What the fuck am I supposed to do!" He shouted. Kenny just sat there and stared at Cartman as he spread his arms out and shouted to the sky. "What the fuck do you want me to do!" He then fell silent and crawled up on the ground. Kenny slowly moved over next to his friend, wrapping an arm around his shoulder.

"That's okay man. That's okay." Although he said it was, Kenny wasn't sure if it was okay. Actually, he was pretty sure it was a bad situation. "Maybe if you just talked to Stan-"

"NO! If I tell Stan, he'll be pissed off at me! And if Stan's pissed off at me, then Kyle's pissed off at me too, and then you'll be pissed off at me-"

"Hey! You know I'm behind you one-hundred percent at all times! That's what a friend does."

"…" They stared at the glistening water for a long while. Finally, Kenny stood up and looked down at Cartman, smiling.

"Come on, man. We got a party to get ready for."

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FINISH! That's that…I guess. Nothing special to say today…except, I guess I kinda made Cartman a bit out of character…oh well. Screw that! Hammanahammanahammana!


	4. A Hella Wild Night

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Wow, a lot of reviews this time! YAY! And if I missed someone, it's only because you're reviews didn't show up on the page before I posted this…oh well, I appreciate all reviews I get! Anyway, answering time:

alien000: Just those three words made me cry in joy. God bless you.

redhed311: Welly-welly-welly…seems like we got one of those Wendy/Stan lovers, huh? Not that I don't like that couple, I just prefer Cartman/Wendy because Wendy/Stan is so easy to predict. And thanks for the heads up; I knew the name, but I just didn't notice making that mistake! Oh well, I'll leave it like that 'cause I don't know how to edit chapters (--). Yeah, I'm an n00b.

Tiger5913: Yes this is getting interesting, no? Heheh…and by the way, screw you!

Leela's tears: Yeah, I was worrying about that at first but then I thought 'Oh well'. Maybe I shouldn't have gone with my instincts, but oh well(eh?). Yeah, you get all mushy when you see Cartman with emotions, don't you? He's a typical "Hard act but soft on the inside". The whole Wendy dyeing her hair was just a silent message to show that people in South Park are starting to change…but I guess I didn't make a strong point, huh?

Crow T R0bot(cool pen name): I hate it when gets screwy…I can't see any fiction summaries now, I don't know why…oh well. Another Stan/Wendy…goddamn it! They're just too stereotypical for my taste, but everyone has opinions. Yeah, but I think I overdid with the descriptions…but I just wanted to get it out of the way so everyone knew who was what and who, y'know? The whole Wendy dyeing her hair was just a silent message to show that people in South Park are starting to change…but I guess I didn't make a strong point, huh?

PS. Sorry, but I won't tell )D, I'm evul. And even though it really, really looks like it, this might not be a Stan/Wendy OR a Cartman/Wendy…I don't think two childhood friends are too likely to grow up together through their whole lives and then become married and live happily ever after…except if they REALLY were good friends/g/bfriends, I guess…but who knows, maybe I'll change I mind?

Well-ety, now it's over, huh? Here comes the chap! (Oh, and by the way. For everyone who are a bit sensitive and for people who have yet to see the rating of this fiction, this chapter will start to get a bit boom-shakalakalakalak…a. Just so you know.)

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**Chapter Four: A Pretty Wild Night**

Kyle had told his parents that he was going to sleep over at Cartman's place too. It had taken a lot of courage to tell Sheila and Gerald a lie, but as he stood in his room, looking at his reflection in the mirror, he had no regrets. It wasn't exactly a formal party, so his tuxedo was hanging in the wardrobe. He had decided to wear his favorite clothes instead: his only pair of blue denim pants, a white shirt with no collar and a red, thin vest. He also wore his fanciest, black shoes. He glanced at the clock. He and Stan had scraped up enough money for a limo, so they, Rebecca and Wendy were all going together in the same ride.

"Time to go…" Kyle headed down the stairs. He made sure his family was still in the Living Room. He didn't want his mother to see him all dressed up because then she would become suspicious. He tiptoed over to the door until he was out of sight for his family. He then opened the door and called to them, "bye!" And then, he left.

Kyle walked over to Stan's house. Once he exited his house to meet Kyle, Stan told that he had lied to his parents that he was going to sleep over at Cartman's place. His parents had never liked Mrs. Cartman very much, so he was sure they wouldn't call to make sure he was there.

"What do you think?" Stan wondered. He spun around. Kyle eyed him: he wore black jeans, a white short-sleeved shirt and blue shoes and a black, short-sleeved vest. He had combed his head forward so that it stood out in front of his face. Kyle smiled.

"Looking good!" He said. Stan chuckled, looking at the road. Then he looked excited.

"Here it comes!" He called as a black limo drove up the road, stopping in front of Stan's house. They quickly ran over to it and knocked on the window. The window rolled down, and a man with short, brown hair wearing a black suit looked out.

"Stan Marsh and Kyle Brofslovski?" He asked. They nodded and he leaned back into the car.

"We gotta hurry before our parents see the car. Come on!" Stan exclaimed. The man nodded and pressed a button, and the lock on the door popped. They opened it and got in. The inside was very impressive. There was brown, leather skin seats placed in a square ring, no seats were the door was, of course. Behind the back seats was a small bar with a variety of drinks. On the floor was a furry rug. Kyle sat down in front of the bar while Stan sat down in the middle of the side opposite to the door. A black window that blocked the chauffeur from being able to see anything in the back rolled down, and the chauffeur himself looked back.

"Where to?" Stan handed him a small note with Wendy's and Rebecca's address. He nodded and rolled up the window again. Kyle and Stan smiled widely.

"This is gonna be so awesome!" Stan exclaimed, rubbing his hand. When he did, something fell out of his breast pocket. Kyle looked at it. It was a pack of condoms. They both stared at it for a moment until Stan put it back into his pocket, his cheeks burning up a little. Kyle stared at him, smiling a little.

"You think Wendy is gonna do it with you? Dude, this is your first date in like years!" He then said, almost whispering as if he thought someone was eavesdropping. Stan shrugged.

"It could happen…come on, could you honestly tell me you don't have protection with you?" Stan wondered, a little suspicious. Kyle's smile faded a little, and he blushed a little as well.

"No…"

"Thought so."

"Well, it is probably gonna be a pretty wild night."

"Yeah…" Not until now did they notice the car had started running.

Kenny was a bit surprised when Cartman came back into the room from the shower, holding some normal-size men's clothes, a blue towel hanging around his waist. He put it down on his bed.

"You take it. Clothes that mom's guys have left." Cartman explained, backing away. Kenny nodded. He ran his fingers through his hand, happy that Cartman had let him take a shower. He felt a little guilty that Cartman was doing so much for him when he was able to do so little in return. He held on tightly to the large, white towel around his waist as he walked over to the bed, looking at the clean clothes. There was a green, short-sleeved shirt, a blue jacket with sleeves reaching to the elbow and black jeans. The green shirt was a bit too large, but the jacket and the pants were just fine. Kenny looked at himself in the mirror.

"Wow! Thanks, Cartman!" He exclaimed, spinning around and looking at his friend. "They're great!" Cartman smiled a little and mumbled something.

"That's cool. So, shouldn't we be going?"

"Yeah. Bebe said that we would meet outside Craig's place around ten past eight." Kenny told. Cartman nodded.

"Okay, just let me get some clothes." Kenny nodded. Cartman just stood there, staring at him. Kenny shrugged, wondering what it was. "Well, I'm not gonna get naked with you standing there!" Kenny laughed a little and left the room. Cartman took off his towel and started searching through his wardrobe.

Soon, he went downstairs, wearing a white, baggy shirt, a black jacket and a pair of old, blue jeans that were starting to get too tight for Cartman as well. He saw Kenny stand at the door. "Let's go!" Cartman exclaimed. He was much happier now when he remembered that there was really no need to worry: the party was really big, he was probably not going to meet, or even see Wendy. The two headed outside and started walking down the street, heading for Craig's home.

The limo stopped. Stan stepped out and headed up a small stone road to a large, purple house. After a moment, he came back into the limo, shortly followed by a giggling, amazed Wendy. She wore a black dress that reached down to her knees and black high heels. She and Stan sat down and sighed.

"Wow, this is awesome! How could you guys afford this?" Wendy wondered, still gaping in awe. Stan loved seeing Wendy smile that way. It made him overjoyed when he did something that pleased her. Kyle shrugged a little.

"It wasn't that hard." After a couple of minutes, the limo stopped again. "I'll be back soon!" Kyle smiled and left them. He stepped out of the limo and looked up. Up ahead of the tiny, stone cobble road was a large, light green house. He hurried over to the door, smiling widely. He pressed the door bell, and soon, it opened.

"Ve-ve, fe-b-b-b-b-b, whu," was all he was able to utter as he saw Rebecca stand there, dressed in a red tank top, a black, knee-long skirt and black high heels. She had styled her hair so that it was all wavy and long. She smiled a little, looking at Kyle.

"What do you think?" Kyle couldn't answer, he just squealed something. Then, he pointed at the limo and smiled a little.

"Limo?" Rebecca gaped.

"Okay, let's go!" Rebecca said, smiling. They stood there for a moment until Kyle reached out with his trembling hand. He shuddered as he felt Rebecca's warm, soft hand take it. The two then walked over to the limo together and got in.

Kenny looked up. "You hear that?" He asked, smiling. Cartman didn't know what he meant. "Listen." And suddenly, Cartman heard it. The sound of loud music, people laughing and shouting. They looked up ahead and saw Craig's large, brown-red house not far away. Behind the pulled together curtains, yellow light and silhouettes were visible. They approached the house, and the music got louder and louder. "Cartman, you go ahead. I'll stay here and wait for Craig." Cartman shrugged and walked over the door. Not until now did he notice a tall, bulky boy was standing there. He recognized him from school. He had short, blonde hair and wore a brown suit similar to those bodyguards wear. As Cartman reached for the brown door handle, the boy put out his arm to stop him.

"Name?" He said with dark, raspy voice. Cartman sighed, rubbing his eyes.

"Eric Cartman." The boy pulled out a clipboard and looked at it. He then smiled.

"Welcome, sir." He opened the door, and Cartman headed inside. He could barely see anything inside. It was completely filled with kids from the school who were walking around, laughing and talking to each other. The first place he entered was a tiny hall. The walls in the house were colored a dark gold. He walked through the large opening to the left into the huge Living Room. Furniture such as the red leather couches and chairs had been moved to the sides of the room to leave room for the people who wanted to dance to the music booming out of the large Woofers standing by the right wall. Cartman looked around. He saw some kids from his class. He saw an empty chair which was placed with a group of other chairs, in which a bunch of the ´cool boys were. Right behind them were two couches occupied by girls. The boys looked at Cartman for a moment until they left and scattered into the mass of people. Cartman sighed and looked at the ceiling. He looked around again. There were large flower pots standing on small pillars placed at the corners of the room. He saw that the girls were looking at him, giggling and laughing a little. He didn't know if he was supposed to feel flattered, insulted, surprised, happy or sad. He decided on surprised when three of the girls sat down on the sides of the chair he sat in and leaned on him. They were quite pretty, one with short, red hair, one with long, blonde hair and one with wavy, long black hair.

"Hi-i!" The redhead exclaimed, giggling as she leaned on Cartman's right side. Cartman smiled nervously.

"Hi?" The other two girls started giggling wildly. Cartman could feel the sour smell of alcohol. The black-haired girl leaned over Cartman so her face was right in front of his, fingering his chest while she pressed hers against his belly.

"Wanna go upstairs?" She whispered into his ear.

"What's upstairs?" Cartman wondered. The girls giggled. The redhead started massaging his shoulder.

"Man, you're uptight. Jenny, go get him a drink." Cartman watched as the blonde left for a moment. She wore a pair of jeans short that reached a couple of inches above her knees and a white tank top. The redhead wore a black cleavage dress. The black-haired girl wore a blue tank top and a red, short-short skirt. Jenny came back, holding a large, red mug in her hand. She handed it to Cartman. Cartman looked at it for a moment before he took a gulp. It burned in his mouth for a long while, but he hid it so the girls wouldn't laugh at him. He felt his mind fog a little. He suddenly found the black-haired girl much more attractive, even though she was very beautiful.

"What about now?" She whispered again. Cartman smiled a little as he took a second gulp of his drink and shrugged. He then stood up, and the girls giggled. The four headed back into the hall and up the stairs at the end. He glanced at the door and saw Kenny and Bebe's faces for a moment, and Kenny stared at him, gaping in awe, as did Bebe.

"Booya!" Cartman shouted out loud to his friend, raising his mug, which made a couple of teenagers look up at him and shout things like "Whoo!" "Score!"

The limo stopped in front of Craig's house, and Kyle helped Rebecca step out, followed by Stan and Wendy stepping out. They walked against the house. They told the bouncer they're names and then stepped inside. Kyle thought he saw Kenny through the crowd for a moment, but he just shrugged and looked at Rebecca, smiling.

"We're gonna go dance! See ya!" Wendy said to Rebecca and Kyle, laughing as she walked off, Stan holding her hand. "Woo!" She shouted as she disappeared into the crowd of people.

"You want something to drink?" Kyle asked, looking at Rebecca. She shook her head, smiling back.

"N-no thanks. Let's go sit down for a moment." Rebecca suggested. Kyle nodded, and they headed to Living Room. They sat down on one of the red couches together and fell silent for a moment. Then, suddenly, they heard a moan. They looked up and saw Kenny and Bebe, and the two were kissing. Kenny moved his hand across Bebe's side in a circular move over and over again, and Bebe smiled a little. Kyle frowned as he heard the sound of their tongues through the loud music.

"God damn it." Kyle mumbled. Rebecca giggled a little and looked at Kyle. Kyle suddenly felt uncomfortable. He looked around and saw that many others were doing the same as Bebe and Kenny. He suddenly felt like he was obligated to kiss Rebecca as well. Kenny and Bebe stopped kissing to take a short breather, and Kenny saw Kyle.

"Oh, hi Kyle! How's it going?" He said. His voice was raspy and low, and he was more than overjoyed. Kyle could only imagine what Kenny felt like, since he had been troubled by extreme sexual tension for years. Bebe was just smiling; her eyelids low, leaning against the couch.

"Everything's good. Just got here." Kyle responded, glancing at Bebe. "Hey, what happened to Cartman?" Kenny looked around and then looked back at Kyle.

"Well, he was feeling a little weird, but he's doing just fine now…believe me, he's feeling great now." Kenny muttered, nodding continuously and smiling widely, his eyelids low. Kyle was confused for a moment, but then he gaped.

"No! How many?"

"Three."

"Good?"

"Penthouse good."

"Holy crap. Cartman out of all people." Kyle mumbled. Rebecca was confused, but she just shrugged and looked at Kyle again. Kenny shrugged as well. Bebe then nudged at him, and he smiled. The two soon went back to their activity, and Kyle turned his attention back to Rebecca. The two smiled for a moment and then started talking a little.

Cartman moved across the hallway on the second floor. He could hear thumping and small noises from behind the many doors, but he didn't mind. The girls had gradually started becoming more intimate with him. Soon, they stopped, and the redhead opened the door to an empty room. They all entered. Cartman's eyes widened a little. It was a bedroom. There was nothing but a king-size bed, a dim light on the ceiling and four other stationary lights standing in each corner of the room.

"Lock the door, Ellen." The black-haired girl said, and the redhead nodded, closing the door and locking it. She then screwed the little control to the lamp, and the light gradually faded until it was almost dark in the room. The girls suddenly backed away from Cartman.

"Well, what do you think, girls?" Jenny said, smiling. The others giggled.

"He is just fine…" Ellen said and then pulled the drapes over the windows. Cartman wasn't sure if he liked where this was going. Suddenly, the black-haired girl moved against him. She started moving her arms over his body and pressing hers against his while staring into his eyes with her dark ones.

"What's your name?" She asked, and he started stepping backwards.

"E-Eric," he mumbled, and suddenly, he tripped over the edge of the bed.

"Mine's Sarah." The black-haired girl said. She then started pulling on his jacket, biting her lip. Finally, she took it off completely. She fingered his chest and then pulled off his shirt. She then got onto the bed and sat down with her knees on the sides of his waist. He leaned over his body and held his head gently. "Come on, girls." The other two, beautiful girls also got onto the bed and started kissing every part of his body while giggling and moaning softly. He started breathing heavier and faster as Sarah fingered his pants and as her hand moved up to his crotch. She then pulled of his pants and he lied there, only in his black boxer shorts. For a moment, she just smiled. She then leaned forward and locked lips with Cartman. They kissed deeply for a long moment. He could feel her tongue wrestling with his. He felt extremely aroused, yet he felt guilty at the same time. Then, Sarah stopped kissing him.

"Is this your first time?" She asked. Cartman stared at her, sweat running down his forehead. "That's okay." She continued. She then backed up a little so her knees were on the sides of his legs. She leaned forward and fingered his shorts, smiling. He then felt them get pulled down. "Ooh…what a man!" She then said, grinning. The other two girls giggled a little. She then leaned forward, and Cartman squealed a little as he saw the top of her head over his crotch on the other side of his large belly.

"Wow…" he mumbled.

Kenny and Bebe walked across the hall and up the stairs, staring at each other the whole time, smiling. Bebe then looked away, her eyes getting a little gloomier.

"Should we really do this?" She wondered. Kenny stopped.

"If you don't want to, then you don't have to." Kenny said.

"Really? Because I don't think I'm ready."

"That's cool. Come on, let's go back downstairs." They turned around and were just about to walk downstairs when they heard one of the doors smash open. They turned back around and saw Timmy, surrounded by seven other girls, roll out on his wheelchair, wearing his pimp clothes. He rolled past them, smiling.

"Tim-my." He said, smiling. "TIMMY!" Four of the girls picked up his wheelchair and carried him down the stairs.

Stan and Wendy danced wildly among the crowd of dancing kids in the renovated, large dining room. "This is fun!" Stan exclaimed while he kept his eyes on Wendy's feet so he could keep up to the beat. He spun around and stumbled a little, almost falling. Laughing, he then grabbed Wendy and the two started dancing together. People stepped away to give them space, and some started clapping to the beat.

"Woo!" Someone shouted, and Stan felt wet drops falling down from above. Someone had gotten hold of a keg of beer and a hose, and they were now spraying it all over. Some grabbed objects around to shield themselves while others laughed and opened their mouths while facing the ceiling. Suddenly, a voice boomed through the loud music and the sound of the kids.

"Everyone to the party lounge! Band is setting up! Time to go crazy!" Stan recognized the voice; it was Craig himself speaking through a microphone from somewhere. Everyone started moving out of the room and to a much larger room. There were two staircases placed on far up ahead on the left and right walls, leading up to a little balcony-like platform with a gold-colored, wooden rack along the edges. On the floor below the platform was a stage, and there was indeed a band set up there. It was actually Token, Clyde, Craig and Timmy. They hadn't started playing, they were getting ready. A few, low tones were heard as Token tested his bass guitar. Clyde swung his drumsticks and looked out at the crowd, and Craig hung his blue electric guitar over his shoulder while setting up a microphone in front of Timmy. Everyone suddenly started screaming and shouting in front of the high stage as Timmy called out his name into the microphone. He had been lead singer in a very famous band called Timmy and the Lords of the Underworld, and ever since, he was respected for his musical skills. Craig leaned out in front of the microphone.

"Are you ready to rock!" He called out, and everyone shouted and screamed again. "Let's rock, then!" He then backed away and counted down from four with his fingers, then, Token started playing his bass guitar, and soon, Clyde followed up. Craig started playing his guitar as well, and soon, Timmy started calling out his names in rhythm to the music. Stan and Wendy started dancing together with the rest of the mass of other kids standing in front of the stage. Suddenly, everyone looked up. Stan looked up as well and gaped. Butters was stumbling around on the balcony, smiling widely. He then climbed up on the rack and started balancing. He almost fell at several times. Then, he stopped and turned against the crowd.

"I'm king of the world!" He shouted, and everyone started woo-ing him and cheering. Then, he threw off his black vest and pounded his beer-stained, turquoise sweater. With a last roar, he leapt off the rack and down against the mass. He was caught, and he laughed loudly as he was tossed around on the crowd of people.

"Wow, guess Butters really can't handle alcohol!" Stan shouted so Wendy could hear him.

"What!"

"I said: guess Butters can't handle alcohol!"

"Oh! Yeah!" Wendy responded, nodding as she danced.

Cartman stumbled out of the bedroom, his vest worn the wrong side and his shirt outside-in. His black pants were pulled up halfway above his knees, and he didn't wear any shoes. He smiled a dumb smile and gazed out into nothingness.

"Sweet…sweet, god damn it…" He mumbled as he stumbled away. The three girls soon came following after, giggling and laughing. They had put on their clothes a little incorrectly as well, and they looked like they still were drunk, just as Cartman.

Kenny tore away from Bebe's kisses as he saw Cartman and his three companions stumble into the room with the couches. Kyle and Rebecca stopped talking and stared at them with wide eyes. "Cartman?" Kenny gasped.

"Mm, yeah?" Cartman replied, still staring forward as he walked around aimlessly, the girls leaning at his sides and following him.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Enjoying the party, you god damn Jew."

"I'm Kenny."

"Oh. Enjoying the party, Kenny."

"God damn it, Cartman."

"What?"

"That was Kyle, Cartman."

"Oh." Cartman finished and stumbled on into the Dining Room together with his followers.

"Whew…that was great!" Stan said as he and Wendy retreated from the large room and into the Dining Room. They saw Cartman and the girls walk around, all of them laughing. "Cartman?"

"Cartman, what the hell?" Wendy exclaimed. Cartman just chuckled a little and let his head fall backwards.

"Dude, I'm so wasted right now, I don't even know what the hell I'm doing," he mumbled. Stan chuckled while he covered his mouth with his hand, but Wendy gaped, her face struck with surprise and shock.

"Cartman, I really think you should go home and go to sleep." She said. It didn't sound like a suggestion, but more of an order. Cartman shrugged and turned around, walking back into the room with the couches, heading for the hall. Wendy shook her head, disappointed. Stan just laughed, amused with the newly acquainted, drunk Cartman.

"Dude, sick!" Kyle exclaimed as Ellen suddenly threw up in one of the flower pots. A bunch of the kids in the room with the band were starting to return to the rest of the house. Sarah started pulling on Cartman's arm, laughing, and the group of four headed back into the hall, the sound of them running up the stairs heard loudly. Rebecca giggled again, covering her mouth with her hands.

"Your friend is weird…and really lucky." She remarked, and Kyle just nodded, gaping. Kenny and Bebe laughed a little and shrugged, getting back to their activities. Wendy and Stan soon came back, Stan still laughing and Wendy gaping in shock.

"Did you guys see Cartman?" Stan coughed through the laughter. "He's almost as badass as Timmy!" Kyle nodded and then shook his head.

"He is going to get into some kind of trouble. I can feel it. Cartman and beer just doesn't go together without chaos in the package." He said and rubbed his eyes. He then looked at Rebecca and smiled. "Well, what are you gonna do?" They started conversing again while Stan and Wendy walked against the hall. Kyle looked up. "Where are you guys going?"

"Just outside." Stan responded. Indeed, he and Wendy left the house and went outside, walking across the snow covered lawn. Wendy put her arm around Stan's and leaned her head against his shoulder.

"So, this was a fun night, wasn't it?" Stan said, smiling. Wendy nodded.

"Mm. I can't believe how fast the time went by! We danced all night!"

"Yeah. It was fun."

"Mhm." They fell silent for a long moment. Stan looked at Wendy, and she turned her head back, looking into his deep, blue eyes. She smiled a little, and then, she felt Stan's lips against hers as he leaned his head forwards. She returned the kiss, and she felt a warm feeling inside as their tongues met.

"So, do you wanna dance?" Kyle wondered as he and Rebecca entered the room where Craig and his band were playing. Rebecca nodded, and they turned against each other. As if they had been watching the two themselves, the band started playing a slow song. Kyle had never really danced to this kind of song, so he nervously put his arms around Rebecca's neck and moved closer. Rebecca put her arms around Kyle's waist and stepped closer as well so they stood with just a few millimeters between them. Kyle felt Rebecca's heavy breath on his chin. He didn't know weather to smile or use any other kind of expression. In an attempt to smile, he started gaping.

"Um, is something wrong?" Rebecca asked. Kyle shut his mouth and smiled awkwardly.

"N-no. Everything's fine." He looked around, unsure what to do. "Nice song, isn't it?" Rebecca smiled and giggled a little. Kyle felt the pressure ease and chuckled. "What's so funny?"

"Well, you're funny. I like you." Kyle stared at Rebecca, completely at a loss of words.

They finally stopped kissing, and Stan gasped for his breath.

"W-whu-wow…" He stuttered, his eyes still closed. Wendy laughed and hugged him. They headed back into the house. As they entered, however, their smiles were wiped off. They found Kenny and Bebe throwing off each others clothes as they hurried up the stairs. "God damn it, are we the only ones who aren't having sex tonight?" Wendy laughed at his comment and pointed at Wendy's abandoned bra.

Kenny struggled to pull off his underwear while he jumped on one leg into the bedroom, following Bebe who was completely naked. He threw his last piece of clothes on the floor and scooped Bebe up into his arms. She laughed out loud and started kissing Kenny as he carried her over to the bed. He placed her down on it and she grabbed him by the arm, pulling him into her embrace.

Cartman panted as he laid down on his back, letting go of Sarah's waist. The other two girls had passed out in with drunken smiles on their faces. Sarah laughed and panted as well, lying down on her back next to Cartman.

"Oh my god! Oh my god, seriously!"

"Nyah…nyah…" Cartman added, smiling. He laughed as he heard someone in the room next to them.

"Harder! Harder, Kenny!" He heard someone scream.

"Hah, Kenny's scoring."

"Who's Kenny?"

"A friend."

"Wanna invite him?"

"Hell no! I am not sharing!" Cartman exclaimed. "You think we should stop now?" He looked at Sarah but found she was no longer lying down, but she now sat on her knees between his spread out legs. She reached forward with his hand, and Cartman let out a small moan, grinning. "God damn it, bitch…"

"Whoa! It's already three in the night!" Stan exclaimed. "We should head home before our parents find out!"

"Yeah! I told mom I was just going to sleep over at Bebe's, I know she would never let me go to one of Craig's party's!" Wendy replied. The two looked around for Kyle and Rebecca. The two suddenly ran into the hall, together with many others.

"Let's get out of here, a bunch of cops are coming in from the back!" Kyle shouted to Stan and Wendy. Suddenly screams were heard, and the music stopped.

"This is a raid! There have been underage drinking going on; anyone found with alcohol in their blood will have to pay!" A voice was heard throughout the house, obviously through a megaphone. However, no one was going to turn them in by free will, and so, everyone ran for the exit. Stan, Wendy, Rebecca and Kyle ran out and ran away from Craig's house, all the time hearing the kids shout from behind. They saw police cars drive by.

"Oh shit, what about the others!" Stan exclaimed once they finally stopped at least thirteen houses away.

Cartman heard the call and got up. He looked out the window and saw the kids running away while policemen ran into the house. He turned around and picked up his clothes, getting dressed as fast as he could. "We gotta get outta here!" He shouted. Sarah dressed up as well.

"Yeah!" At first, she looked like she was going to wake up Ellen and Jenny, but then she just ran past them, ignoring them. She pulled up the window. "We'll just have to jump out." She said.

"What! I jumped off a two storey house once; I fell into a coma for two days!" Sarah sighed in frustration, but then she looked up, baffled.

"Really, you fell in a coma? Wait- that doesn't matter! We don't have choice! Now go!" She pointed at the window.

"What! Why do I have to go first!"

"You're the big strong man, you go!"

"Ugh…fine, whatever." Cartman stumbled over to the window and looked out. He carefully climbed out and was just about to jump when he noticed a large pile of snow just next to where he would land if he let go. He swung to his sides, gaining momentum. He then let go, and as he had planned, he landed in the snow pile unharmed. Sarah looked out.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine! Just jump into the snow pile!" Cartman said and got up. Sarah climbed out and jumped over to the pile, landing safely as well. The two then carefully snuck out of the front yard and hurried away from the house.

"Oh shit. Oh shit!" Kenny and Bebe had managed to escape from the house, but they were now sitting in a bush not far away: completely naked.

"Well, at least we lost our clothes for a good cause." Kenny said, grinning. Bebe glared at him first, but she couldn't help but smile too.

"Yeah…was it your first time?"

"Yes. Finally." Kenny said. Bebe laughed. "But what we have to do now is get the hell out of here! Let's see…well, there's a short cut from here over to Stan's place, the others probably went over there. Maybe we can sneak over there and if we get there before the others, they can help sneak us into Stan's room so we can hide out until we get some clothes." Kenny suggested.

"Sounds good to me."

"Okay, we'll have to make a run for it. Just follow me. One…two…" Kenny looked up from the bush and sighed when he saw that there was a large group of kids who were walking by, just leaving the party. "…cover your face, three!" He put up his hands over his face, as did Bebe, and the two ran off. Once the kids saw them, they called out and cheered loudly.

"Here it is!" Stan said once they walked out from behind the house and entered the road where he lived. They had used the shortcut that lead from Craig's house to Stan's block. "You guys are all welcome to stay for the night if you-oh my god." Stan said as he looked away from the group and at Kenny and Bebe who ran down the street. At first, they all laughed, but when they stopped at Stan's house and looked around, their faces fell.

"Isn't that Kenny and Bebe!" Kyle exclaimed. Kenny held his hands over his family jewels while Bebe tried to hide both her female specials. Rebecca gaped widely, much like Stan Kyle, but Wendy started laughing so hard that she had to lean against Stan for support.

"Guys! A little help?" Bebe called out.

As soon as they turned on the lights in the hall, Stan could hear footsteps from the Living Room. "Stan?"

"Kyle, hurry and take them to my room!" Stan whispered, and everyone hurried up the stairs as quiet and fast as they could. "Yeah mom, it's me!" Stan called back. Sharon entered the hall, wearing a purple robe.

"I thought you were going to sleep over at Cartman's?"

"Uh, yeah…we couldn't, since Mrs. Cartman was sick when she came home, so we had to leave."

"At three in the night?"

"She came home late…you know, she is a dirty-"

"Stan!"

"Well, come on…" It wasn't exactly the biggest secret of South Park that Mrs. Cartman was quite wild woman and some went to the limits of calling her a 'dirty slut'. Sharon shrugged.

"Okay, you go to sleep then…we'll talk tomorrow." Stan nodded and headed up the stairs. When he got to his room, the others were sitting on the floor, waiting for him. Kenny and Bebe had taken Stan's sheets and rolled themselves into them, hiding behind his bed. "What do we do now?" Stan whispered, careful to not risk waking anyone else. He locked the door.

"Well, I can't come home this late. My mom would be furious!" Kyle whispered back. Everyone else agreed, except for Kenny.

"I don't really give a crap. Can I stay here?" He asked. Stan thought about it for a while and then nodded.

"You can all stay, if you want too. But we'll have to stick around here; no one knows that I've got five teenagers hiding out in my room." Stan said, trying to make everyone see the comic in the situation. When nobody laughed, he stopped chuckling and shrugged. "I got two sleeping bags and a couple of sheets. I, Kyle and Kenny will take the sheets." Stan said, trying to be the gentleman he always was.

"How about you guys take the sheets, and me and Bebe will take the bed-" Kenny was interrupted by an elbow from Bebe in the ribs. He stopped and held his side, chuckling. "It was worth a try…"

Cartman and Sarah walked through the neighborhood. They had sobered up a little thanks to the fresh air and the run (plus the coffee they had picked up from a shop nearby), and Sarah turned to be less wild than she was when she was intoxicated.

"Look…the reason I did…all of that is because-" Sarah started, but Cartman stopped and interrupted her.

"Because you were drunk, I know. Not like I assumed anything else, I do have a mirror at home." He said, smiling even though he was completely aware of the fact that he had just insulted himself. Sarah didn't answer, not wanting to be rude.

"What do we do now?" She said, staring at the pavement road.

"Don't you have a home?"

"Yeah…but I don't feel like going there…my parents and I had a big fight, 'cause they didn't want me going to the party, and I kinda blew them off and went anyway…" She explained. Cartman nodded, mumbling "aha". He was a little surprised over what was happening. Here he was, walking with a beautiful, complete stranger as if they were friends, just barely half an hour after they had ´rocked the casba. They both fell silent and continued to walk, no special destination in mind. Cartman opened his mouth to say something several times, but he stopped instantly every time. "Were you gonna say something?" Sarah wondered. Cartman looked stared at his feet, not responding.

"Well…you could stay over at my place…"

"Um, I don't know if I should…" It amazed Cartman what kind of a situation they were in. He could only imagine how embarrassed Sarah must have felt, having sex with an overweight boy while being drunk and then having to go through a conversation with him after sobering up. Sarah looked at Cartman, and she knew what he was thinking. "But, on the other hand, I guess that would be better than going home…I live pretty far away…" Sarah told. Cartman got the impression that she was trying to console him in a way, but he decided not to think about it too much.

"Okay, cool," he mumbled, smiling a little. It didn't take long until they reached Cartman's house. They entered, and Cartman looked around to see if his mother was home. Judging from the fact that she wasn't anywhere downstairs, and there were no sounds coming from upstairs, Cartman assumed she was out at some bar. Not many knew that Mrs. Cartman often went to bars at night to meet men, but Cartman never cared very much. Cartman looked at Sarah, who stood by the door, leaning against the wall and looking around nervously. "Uuh…" Sarah looked up. "Do you wanna go to sleep or whatever?" Cartman asked.

"I think I'll hit the sack." She answered. She surprised Cartman the way she sounded so firm and secure suddenly.

"Um, okay…you can take my bed…my bedroom is the third door to the right, upstairs…I'll sleep on the couch."

"You don't have too…"

"No, that's cool."

"Okay." And with that, Sarah rushed upstairs. Cartman walked into the Living Room and sat down on the couch. He stared at the floor, not moving in anyway. He first felt incredibly depressed and ashamed at what he had done. Then, he started thinking of Wendy. He couldn't help but feel like he had cheated on her somehow; as if he had betrayed her. He looked at the bag of Cheesy Poofs on the table. He reached for it, eating always cheered him up. As he picked up a Cheesy Poof, he stared at it for a long time. He suddenly felt disgusted, dirty and so he dropped the bag, spilling the Cheesy Poofs all over the floor. He noticed his whole body was trembling. He walked over to the window and pulled off the curtains. He then lied down on the couch and covered himself in the curtains, trying to go to sleep.

* * *

FINISH! I told you it was gonna get a bit 'whoa' from here, no? Well, I guess this adds to the tension and intense feelings, huh? Fun, fun, fun! See ya next time! 


	5. It Stings

Not much to say today except this; Sarah, Ellen and Jenny were fictional characters by me, they are not part of South Park. I have copyright on those, and if you try to steal, you will be nuked and prosecuted. HAH! Review answering!

redhead11: I know, I know, I was just messing with you. ;D. Lol.

sonekasoyer: Hey, you decide if you wanna review or not. But the first one is better though. Thanks for the review!

Leela's tears: Why thank you. Yes, there are WAY too many South Park slash fics out there. God bless the South Park nonslash C2. Not that I have anything against homosexuality, I believe in freedom of speech, but still…just because a bunch of boys hung out a lot during their childhood doesn't mean they're gay. Jesus Christ.

Well, that's about it. Except the actual chapter, ()>(XX) ()

* * *

**Chapter Five: It Stings**

Sarah left Cartman's house early in the morning, leaving a note on the table for Cartman to find when he woke up, much like the group of teenagers snuck out of Stan's house early, careful not to wake up.

During the whole weekend, Cartman kept himself in his room. He unplugged his phone and his modem and ignored the sound of the doorbell, not allowing anyone to contact him in any way. He knew that Stan, Kyle and Kenny were probably hanging out, talking about the party and enjoying one another's company. Cartman felt like he shouldn't face them, nay, he felt he didn't deserve being around people like his friends. It also seemed he felt the same about food. No matter how many times his mother knocked on the door, begging him to come out and get some beef cake, he wouldn't leave the warmth under the bed sheets.

Monday morning came. Kyle, Stan, Kenny and a bunch of their other classmates stood at the bus stop. For today, Kyle had decided to wear his orange, green-collar jacket, black pants and green beanie. Stan wore a black, rather thick feather jacket, blue jeans and a white shirt under the jacket. He had bought a new, blue hat, cut of the little red pompom on his old hat and stuck it to the new hat. Kenny wore his old and wrong sized parka, his blue jeans and a white shirt under the parka. He had also stolen a pair of brown gloves from his father.

"Hi f-f-fellas…" A familiar voice said. The boys looked up and saw Butters standing there, wearing his trademark, turquoise sweater and his dark green pants together with grey loafers. He looked very depressed, rolling his thumbs and staring at the ground as he approached them.

"Butters, what the hell are you doing here!" Kyle exclaimed. Butters lived at least ten blocks away, and they never saw him in the morning, except maybe on the weekends. He scratched his head, messing up a portion of his blonde hair. There was dried stain on his sweater.

"Well…after the party, some kids carried me out of the house so the cops wouldn't arrest me…I woke up in the inner part of the town and walked around for a while until I reached my place…my parents were pretty mad when they noticed I was drunk, so they locked me out…I've kinda been walking around all weekend…"

"What! You were locked outside all weekend! Where did you sleep!" Stan asked, gawking just like Kyle and Kenny was.

"Well…I don't remember where I slept the first night, but I managed to find a nice box and slept near Starks Pond the night after that."

"God damn it, what's wrong with your parents!" Kyle exclaimed, not sure if he should be angered with Butters's parents or become frightened of them.

"Nothing…I guess I deserved it…" They watched as Butters walked past them, still staring down. Sometimes, it was amazing how Butters just took everything in, never fighting back or protesting.

"Hey Cartman!" Kenny suddenly shouted out as none other than the husky boy walked against them, wearing his large, baggy, red shirt and grey pants. "Um, Cartman…have you lost weight?" Kenny wondered, staring Cartman with a strange look.

"Hah, really funny, Kenny." Cartman mumbled. His voice had turned raspy and light.

"No, I'm serious." Kenny replied.

"Dude, really…you're all pale…" Kyle said, concerned. Cartman was indeed very pale, and his eyes were a bit red.

"Aye! Back off!" Cartman suddenly yelled, startling the other boys.

"Sorry dude…take it easy…" Kenny mumbled. Cartman shrugged.

"Sorry."

"That's okay." The bus suddenly stormed up the road. Today, the bus driver was much jitterier and cheery, different from his usual, drug induced-like behavior. Everyone got on the bus, chatting and talking loudly. The boys sat in their spot in the back of the bus. The last seat was once again taken by Butters. Kenny looked at Cartman who sat next to him, staring at the floor of the bus.

"Dude, what's wrong?" Kenny wondered. Cartman sighed and the two leaned their heads closer to each other's so they could talk without anyone else hearing. "Well?" Kenny whispered.

"Dude, I'm just feeling a bit…weird about the whole party thing…" Cartman whispered back.

"Weird how?"

"Well, me and Sarah-the brunette," Cartman explained when Kenny gave him a confused look. "-got to talking, and she's a nice girl…and I feel kinda weird about that whole getting drunk and getting poontang thing because of…you know, her." Kenny didn't show any expression, he just nodded as if to say ´I see, I understand.

"Maybe you should try and get in touch with this Sarah chick."

"Nyah…" Cartman groaned, sitting up properly.

Once they finally reached school, they all headed too the main classroom. They took their usual seats in the back of the classroom. After a while, Mr. Garrison and Mr. Slave entered, getting to their positions by the teacher's desk.

"Okay, shut up…" No one heard him and continued to chatter. "Shut up, please…" Yet again, Mr. Garrison was ignored. "God damn it you little ratass bitches, shut up!" Everyone fell silent as Mr. Garrison roared. He calmed down instantly and smiled at the kids, gazing over them with his poisonous, amused look. "Okay then, can I begin now? Thank you. First, I'm supposed to inform you that we have two new little assholes joining my tiny little horde of annoying imbeciles." He knocked on the desk lightly, and the door opened. A girl and a boy entered. The girl was around the same height as the others, quite thin and pretty. She had long, bright red hair and blue, glistening eyes. She wore a pair of orange, long tight pants and a purple shirt. The boy looked like one of those kids who tried to put on the rouge, mysterious act. He had short, auburn hair that was combed down on his head. He wore a tight, black shirt and black pants. He was frowning and his dark eyes were staring at the floor. He was quite muscular. "Welcome your new classmates, Katie and Lucas." There were quiet murmurs of "Hi Katie and Lucas…" or "Welcome…" Katie sat down with the other girls and smiled. Lucas looked around for a place to sit. Everyone stared at him anxiously, as if the place where he would sit down now would determine his popularity and social status for the rest of his school years. For a moment, some shook their heads in disappointment when Lucas started moving against Butters and his group, but then he stopped and walked over to Craig, Clyde, Token, Jimmy, Kevin and Mark. As he sat down, some seemed pleased while others shook their heads in disappointment.

"Dude, I recognize that Katie from somewhere…" Stan whispered.

"I think she was in our class for a while before…" Kyle replied. Stan nodded, mumbling something. Afterwards, Mr. Garrison did role call before continuing with his usual lecturing. Kenny was a bit surprised when he saw Cartman was just staring at the wall, not taking any notes at all. He remembered that Cartman had behaved like this in class before, but after being told that he was on the verge of having to redo his last year before High School, he started doing better in class to everyone's amazement.

"Hey Cartman, what's up?" Kenny whispered, leaning over the table a little. Cartman shook his head and turned against Kenny. He made an attempt to smile, but failed miserably.

"Nothing, why?"

"I was just wondering, where were you all weekend?"

"Home."

"You were?" Cartman felt a sting inside of him. A sting he was well familiar with.

"Why didn't you come and check if needed to know?" Kenny shrugged and looked back at his book, continuing to write. The sting returned at full force, and for a moment, Cartman thought he was going to vomit, but the feeling slowly subsided and was replaced with the same emptiness he had felt all weekend.

The boys sat at a table close to the tables were the others in their class sat at lunch. It seemed that love had struck each of them, and no one seemed to eat anything. Stan had dropped his fork on the floor and was just staring at Wendy, just like Kyle and Kenny who were smiling widely as they gazed at Rebecca and Bebe. Cartman was just staring at his food, feeling nauseous. For a moment, Kenny was able to tear his view away from Bebe and to his friend. He was very concerned now; Cartman was always chomping down his food as fast as he could. But today, his pork chops and beef were left untouched on his plate. Kenny leaned over his food a little so his face was just a few inches away from Cartman's.

"Dude, seriously, what's up with you? You should be happy, I mean…you scored. You scored big time!" Kenny whispered. For a moment, Cartman looked up, and his face glowed with fury. But then, his eyebrows fell and he stood up, walking away from the lunch table. Kenny hurried after him.

"Where are you going?" Stan called out after them.

Cartman walked as fast as he was able to. All he wanted was to get out of the school. But as he looked up, he stopped. He felt as if his whole world was about to spin out of control. Sitting with some other girls was a black-haired beauty, laughing and talking with her friends. Kenny caught up with him and placed his hand on Cartman's shoulder.

"What are you looking at?" Kenny turned in the direction Cartman was staring. "Oh, dude, isn't that one of the chicks-" But he fell silent as Cartman gave him another glare. He looked back at Sarah. Suddenly, he felt a sting. A sting.

"No…no…" Cartman mumbled.

"What?" Kenny wondered. Cartman shut his eyes tight and started shaking his head, his hands wrapped tight around it.

"No, no, no!" He screamed, and then he ran off. Kenny was a bit surprised; he had never seen Cartman run like that. He shot a slight glance over at Sarah; she, like many of the kids had fallen silent to see who had caused the screaming. He then ran after his friend.

´No. No. No, no, no, no, no, no," was all that went through Cartman's mind as he ran out of the school and down on the road. He started slowing down, his size difficulties catching up with him. He felt the adrenaline pump through his body; the sting was still there in his chest. He kept walking and heard Kenny call for him not far behind. He felt Kenny's shoulder brush against his as he ran up to his side.

"Come on, Cartman, talk with me." Kenny said. "What's the problem?" Cartman didn't speak; he knew that if he opened his mouth, he would throw up everywhere. "Is it about Wendy again?" Cartman shook his head. "Is it about the party?" Cartman took a deep inhale and then opened his mouth, throwing up whatever he had managed to get down during the last days. Kenny jumped away, watching the vomit splatter onto the ground. Cartman leaned against the chain link fence outside of the school and breathed heavily.

"Kenny…please…just leave me alone for a while, okay?" Cartman mumbled through the panting and huffing. "I just…I just wanna be alone for a while." Kenny stood there, completely silent, for a long moment. Then he nodded.

"Okay…okay, you go ahead…I'll tell Mrs. Jenkins you're not feeling pretty well." He said, putting his hands in his pockets. He watched Cartman turn and walk away, and he did the same. He felt so weak. He knew he needed to do something, anything, to make his friend feel better, but there was nothing he could do. He sighed and looked up at the school.

* * *

I didn't intend to make this a long chapter, but more just a chapter to intensify...what does the "No, no, no!" mean? And what is the sting? Find out in the next chapter of South Park High!

Eat Snacky Smores.


	6. Tomato's A Fruit

I'm back with a new chapter! I've been working with this other crap, been kinda busy. Well, first to answer the ONE review I got for my latest chapter, argh:

Courteney: I'm sorry, but I already have the story all planned out; I can't put in a major character now. However, maybe I'll make a cameo with Shanna or something.

Not much else to say.

* * *

**Chapter Six: Tomato's A Fruit **

_I don't like this anymore. I liked it at first, but not anymore. I thought it was good for me, that it would ultimately help me evolve as a person…but now, it sucks ass._

_I don't like me anymore. Kyle was right all along. I am a fatass. I am a stupid, fucking fatass. That's why I can't risk losing a friend to be with a fucking chick because I'm too much of a stupid fatass to make new friends. Goddamn it…I don't want to be me. I wanna be Kenny. Or Kyle. Or Stan. Even Butters would do. No, I changed my mind, not Butters._

_Maybe it'll blow over…maybe I'll just forget this…feeling someday. That would be nice. Cause I don't like it anymore. It's not…good…anymore._

_Or maybe I deserve it. I think I do._

_It would be nice to die. I think Kenny was lucky sometimes. He would have those weird periods when he would die randomly…I wonder what that is like. It must have been nice, getting to be free from this fucking world for just a few hours…how the fucking hell did he always come back!_

_No, this is all Wendy's fault. If she wouldn't have been such a bitch with her goddamn hair and her smarts and her ice-skating and all of her shit…if she wouldn't have been so fucking goddamn selfish! Sexual tension…fucking bitch._

_Maybe I should die. Maybe I should do the 'unthinkable'. That would be weird. Wonder if anyone would miss me? Probably not. Except for mom maybe…no, she has her boyfriends, she wouldn't give a shit._

_Maybe if I became thin, like Stan, she would like me. Fucking hippie asshole, it's all their fault. Stan and Wendy. Cartman and Wendy. Cartman and Wendy. Cartman and Wendy._

_I don't like it anymore._

The next day, Cartman was missing from school. Stan and Kyle weren't that worried, but Kenny wasn't sure if Cartman was just sick. They sat in their usual seats in the back of the classroom as Mr. Garrison wrote on the blackboard. They wore the same as yesterday, except Kenny had left his old parka behind and instead wore a denim jacket.

"Dude, do you guys know where Cartman is?" He wondered, leaning against Kyle who sat beside him. Kyle shook his head, not looking up from his book.

"I'm sorry, but Eric left early this morning. I thought he was going to meet you boys." The boys had headed over to Cartman's home after school, on Kenny's command. Kenny was even more concerned as Mrs. Cartman informed them that Cartman had not been at home. She headed back into her home, closing the door, leaving the boys outside.

"Dude, where the hell is fatass!" Kyle exclaimed, waving his arms. The boys didn't say anything after as they continued their travel back home.

Cartman looked out of the window, watching the outside scenery pass by as the bus started moving again. He held his yellow backpack tightly against his chest. He looked at the others on the bus. The disgust that he felt only motivated him more…but when he thought back at the one thing that motivated him the most to do this, he sighed and looked back out of the window. "Fuck…" He mumbled, feeling a small smile creep up on his face subconsciously.

Two weeks. Two weeks went by, and it seemed that no one had cared enough to put up a search for Cartman. Stan, Kyle and Kenny were the only ones who seemed to be willing to look for Cartman. They had put up several, large pictures of Cartman with alerts and phone numbers on them around town, but many were taken down by Officer Barbrady since if they didn't have a license, it was considered litter. They had even went to the police office, and even though they had thoroughly explained that two weeks had gone by, Barbrady kept saying that they had to wait for twenty-four hours.

It was Monday of the third week since Cartman had been missing. The boys were too sad and worried to say anything to each other as they met at the bus stop with some of their other classmates. Stan wore his white shirt, his black, thick vest and blue jeans, Kyle wore his beanie, his green jacket and his black pants. Kenny had taken his denim jacket and his blue jeans for the day. Kenny looked at the other kids. Some had helped putting up pictures and searching, but most had been happy when they heard Cartman was gone, since everyone remembered how terrible he was against everyone during their younger years. Once the bus arrived, they got in the back with Butters. Tweek soon came to join them. Butters rolled his thumbs, humming a song as quietly as he could. He looked up at the three boys and noticed they were all bothered by something.

"Are you okay, fellas?" Butters wondered with the same innocent smile on his face as usual.

"No! Cartman is still missing, dude!" Kenny exclaimed.

"He is!" Butters replied, horror striking his face. "No one told me that!"

"Dude, it's been like two weeks!" Stan stated, amazed as he looked at the clueless Butters. Butters gasped and looked down, as if he had done something wrong.

The blue math books were left untouched as Mrs. Jenkins lectured. Cartman had been missing during the three first lessons. Kenny, Stan and Kyle were all too concerned to concentrate on math. Actually, everyone had a hard time concentrating, as Timmy was very upbeat today. He kept shouting out "Timmy!" and random gibberish.

"Ugh…when will this day end…" Kyle murmured, sighing. Everyone looked up as the door opened. Gasps were heard as a boy stepped into the classroom, wearing a white shirt and a blue vest, together with black pants. Kyle gaped, his eyes just like his friend's widening. "Cartman!" Indeed, the boy was Cartman, although he had lost A LOT of weight. Cartman smiled nervously as he walked into the back of the classroom and sat down next to Kenny. Everyone started whispering until Mrs. Jenkins managed to settle everyone down and continue her lecturing. Kenny leaned over to Cartman.

"Dude, what the hell! Where were you!"

"Well, I signed up for a program called Intensive Weight Care. Just plain, intensive training and a diet for two weeks." Cartman explained, smiling a little. It was amazing how he looked so…different. But it was still there, Kenny could see it. It wasn't like the time Cartman had hired a thinner version of himself to trick everyone that he had lost weight, it was for real. Cartman was no longer ´fatass, he was actually thin. Actually, some of the girls were giving Cartman looks that popular people like Stan knew all too well.

"Wow…I mean, two weeks? How'd you do that!" Kyle wondered, surprised.

"Dude, are you deaf? I just told you guys…" Cartman said, chuckling a little. Kyle didn't find this funny; he continued gaping just like Stan.

"Hey Eric, you're really looking good!"

"Hi Eric!"

Cartman waved to the group of girls as they walked by the lunch table, giggling and speaking to each other. He was of course very happy but he felt as if the joy was false…hollow. But, he kept smiling and turned back against his friends, who were all still baffled. He smiled even wider, surprised how much a physical change could make everything so different. He thought everyone was being a bit shallow, but he still enjoyed it.

"Cartman…" Kyle mumbled, still gaping a little.

"Yes?" Cartman answered, picking a small Tupperware box out of his backpack. He opened it and fished out a fork. They all gasped as they watched him beginning to eat something they had never seen him eat before: a salad.

"You're eating vegetables…" Kyle continued. Cartman chuckled a little in response.

"Yeah, so?"

"You're eating vegetables."

"Well, I realized I needed a healthier life."

"You're eating vegetables…"

"I…know."

"…tomatoes and cucumbers…"

"Actually, tomato's a fruit." Cartman corrected. Kyle let out a little squeal and looked back down at his food. Stan tried to say something, but only a small wheeze came out and he looked down at his food as well.

"Why didn't you leave a note or something! We were worried!" Kenny exclaimed, his rage starting to unleash as he was beginning to process all that had happened during the day.

"I couldn't! I left last minute, had no time." Cartman said, still smiling. However, Kenny was not pleased.

"Had no time! Had no time!" He fell silent after that and sunk back into his seat, starting to pick at his food.

"So, you guys wanna do something?" Cartman wondered as the boys headed home from school. The others were starting to adjust to the new Cartman after having a long argument about how insensitive Cartman had been, just leaving without saying anything. But since he had done it for a good cause, they didn't bother him more about that and instead tried to act normal.

"Yeah sure, why not?" Kenny said. "Anything if it keeps me away from those assholes at home…"

"I'm up for it." Stan said.

"If you're all in, I'm in too." Kyle added.

"Okay! My place it is!" Cartman said happily.

As they kicked off their shoes, Cartman headed around the house to see if his mother was home. He found her in the kitchen, baking something. "Hi mom." He said, smiling. For a moment, Mrs. Cartman didn't do anything. Then, she stopped and slowly raised her head. She then turned it to face Cartman. At first she seemed incredibly mad, but then she looked happy.

"Eric…you're…"

"Not fat?" He watched as a tear fell down his mother's face and he knew that moment that he was forgiven. Mrs. Cartman gave him a hug and continued with her baking.

"You run off and I'll bring you a cake real soon, okay poopykins?" She said, smiling. Cartman nodded and hurried back to his friends who were sitting in his room. He found them playing the Okama Gamesphere and sat down on the floor. He was happy just watching them play, since they hadn't even noticed he had entered the room. And it struck him…it was the first time he wasn't too large to be able to hide.

"Whoo! I win!" Kyle exclaimed, putting down his controller just like the other boys. "I wi-in, I wi-in!"

"Meh, I'm tired of playing games anyways…" Stan said, leaning back on Cartman's bed. Kenny and Kyle sat on the edge of it, Cartman sitting on the floor next to it. Stan looked at Cartman. "What was it like?"

"What?" Cartman wondered.

"The program. The exercising."

"Oh, that. Well, you know that story about the guy who was doomed to forever push a stone up a mountain, and whenever he got to the top, the stone would roll down and he would start over?"

"Yeah."

"I wasn't that guy."

"Huh?"

"I was the guy who was doomed to forever sit there and watch to make sure that the guy didn't try to run away…" Stan laughed a little when Cartman said this.

"Well, it must feel pretty good now, huh?" Kyle wondered, leaning forward a little.

"Unbelievable…check out what I can do!" Cartman said. He stood up and bent down, touching his toes while keeping his legs straight. No one was really impressed; that move was often used as a simple warm-up during P.E. "I could never do that before!" Cartman said, smiling widely. The others tried to see where he was coming from, but the joy that Cartman was experiencing was probably something one could only understand if they had accomplished what he had.

"Dude, what do we do now?" Kyle wondered.

"Talk?" Kenny suggested.

"Talking sucks ass." Cartman said.

"Meh…what else is there to do?" Stan mumbled. They all fell silent, completely still for a moment. "Hey, have you talked to the gals lately?"

"No." Kyle said. "I tried, but she was kinda busy…"

"I'm working on it…" Kenny mumbled, thinking back to the night of the party. Everyone looked at Cartman. He sighed and shook his head.

"They were all goddamn drunk…" He murmured, and the others laughed. The boys once again fell silent, not knowing what to say or do. Kyle suddenly stood up.

"I gotta get home…see ya!" He said and hurried out. Stan got up as well.

"Wait for me!" He called out, running after Kyle. Kenny looked at Cartman and became confused. Cartman was just staring at the floor, his head slightly tilted to his left. There was a sheepish smile on his face that made him look as if he wasn't quite aware of…anything.

"Cartman? Cartman…are you awake?" Kenny asked, waving his hand out in front of his friend a little. Cartman looked up.

"Sorry, I kinda started daydreaming…"

"About what?" And then, Cartman's smile faded. He felt the sting. And he frowned. He was furious. He understood now.

No matter what he did, it wouldn't blow over. It wouldn't go away. It was there to stay until Cartman did something about it.

"Kenny…"

"Yeah?"

"If you were Stan…and I really want you to imagine you're in his shoes…with his life around you…" Kenny knew where this was going and smiled sympathetically. "Would you…forgive me?"

"Cartman…I really can't imagine that kind of situation…it's just one of those things you have to go through…" Cartman stared straight into Kenny's eye, a raging flame burning inside of his eyes.

"Don't you get it! I am going through it! I am!" He exclaimed. He felt anger and depression at the same time as he stood up. And to make it worse, he felt the thing. "Don't you understand that I am going through it!" He shouted again. He stood there, his face red. Kenny wasn't hurt at all; he felt with Cartman. And he watched as Cartman fell to his knees, tears running down his cheeks quietly, and once again he felt guilty that he couldn't help his friend anymore than he had already tried.

Kenny was asleep on Cartman's bedroom floor in a yellow sleeping bag. Cartman slowly snuck out of his bed and over to his desk. He took a tiny, red book out from his wardrobe and turned on the little lamp on his desk. He opened the book and took a pen out from a tiny yellow cup.

_I don't know if it helped just yet…it's only been a day…but I don't think it will. I realized something today; I'll always be Cartman the stupid, evil, insensitive, fat, weird, insane, rude jackass. And Stan will always be goodie two-shoes who goes out of his way to help the helpless and innocent and yattayatta. And Wendy will always be too good for me…goddamn it, I cried in front of Kenny today! Fucking shit._

_

* * *

_

Yeah, probably didn't see that coming, did ya? 'OH MY GOD, CARTMAN'S THIN! WHAT MADE YOU DO THAT!' Well, my friends…I don't know. I just felt like it. What you gonna do about, huh? Huh!


	7. It's Long, Black And Silky

I'm back! Yay! No, but seriously. Nothing much I have to say, here's review answering!

sonekasoyer: Why, thank you! Well, about the crying thing, it was like an emotional breakdown. I think Kenny pushed it a little.

Call Me Blue Streak: The power of laser-from-the-head is finally mine! MUHAHAHAHA! Cool, presents! And Invader Zim plushie! YAY! That game was good. Well, I really appreciate the stuff, but next time, I would REALLY like it if you told me what you liked and didn't like and such. Thanks again! And…

OBEY THE FIST!

Here's the chapter.

* * *

**Chapter Seven: It's Long, Black And Silky**

The boys sat down in the main classroom and waited for Mr. Garrison and Mr. Slave to show up. Kenny, Kyle and Stan were cheerfully chatting, but Cartman was drawing. Kyle sneaked a look at the paper and saw what he had drawn.

"Wow! That's really good, Cartman!" He complimented while smiling and nodding, impressed. Cartman smiled back and thanked him. He looked back at the drawing, which was of a girl in her teenage years. She was leaning against the safety rack of a bridge. Behind her, the water sparkled as the sun was slowly sinking below the horizon. The girl had long, dark hair, wore a shirt, a beret and pants, but luckily, Kyle had not noticed the resemblance to the person whom Cartman had used as a model for the girl. The girl smiled as she looked down on the ground. At the lower, left corner, Cartman was writing something. 'The girl of my dreams, the girl that I love, makes my heart fly like it's been picked up by a dove. Beautiful, smart, funny and talented. The only girl I want, the girl that I need, the girl that is just too good for me,' he had written.

Kenny looked at the picture, and as soon as he saw the small poem, he was struck with an amazed look. He wondered how Cartman dared draw and write something like that in school where anyone could swipe it when he wasn't looking and start getting ideas.

"Yeah, I know! It's funny, isn't it?" Cartman looked up, as did the other boys, as Wendy, Bebe and Julia stepped into the classroom. Bebe wore a pink, tight shirt and blue jeans, Julia wore a red shirt, a blue blouse and black pants. Wendy wore a green shirt, a navy blue, short sleeved jacket and blue jeans. It seemed she had returned her hair back to its natural, black color. Stan gaped, as did Kenny.

"Wow…" Both said simultaneously. Cartman made a huge effort not to say the same as the other two, and instead he started biting on his lip and stared forward at the black board. Soon, the classroom was filled, and the teacher together with his ´assistant entered. After roll call, Mr. Garrison started talking about Ricky Martin and the Latin culture. Cartman winced as he heard Mr. Garrison call out his name.

"Eric, are you paying attention!" He shouted out, and Cartman cringed.

"Yes…"

"Then you can tell me who the true Latin king of pop is!"

"Ricky Martin?"

"No, you dumbass!" Mr. Garrison responded angrily. He walked over to Cartman's table and looked at what Cartman was doing. "Aha! Scribbling when the teacher is talking, huh? If it's so important, I think you should share it with the rest of the class!" A menacing smile spread out on Mr. Garrison's face. Cartman frowned.

"I really don't-"

"Now, Eric!"

"Okay!" Cartman took his picture and walked over to the front of the classroom. Some giggled and chuckled when they looked at him standing there. He scratched the back of his head and then held up the picture for everyone to see it. Nobody really cared about the picture, most were just quietly laughing at Cartman. As he gazed out over the class, he noticed Bebe was giving him strange looks…as if she was suspicious of something. Cartman became confused, but he was soon shooed back into his seat by Mr. Garrison.

The kids entered the cafeteria and walked over to the line. Once they finally got to their turn, they saw Chef standing there, dressed in a red shirt, black pants and a chef's hat. They smiled when they saw him; he had been home sick the day before.

"Hey, little crackers!" He greeted when he saw them.

"Hey Chef!" They all said in unison. Chef looked at Cartman and smiled with a questioning look on his face.

"Any sign of Eric yet? I've been really worried. " He said. They all smiled when they realized Chef didn't even recognize Cartman.

"Chef…it's me. Eric Cartman." Cartman said, pointing at himself. Chef just stood still and stared at Cartman, and then his jaw dropped and eyes widened.

"Eric! Is that you? My god, you have really lost a lotta' weight!" He exclaimed, rubbing his chin. Cartman nodded, still grinning. Chef gave them their food and then said good bye as they left. They decided to sit down with Clyde, Craig, Token and the other boys. They talked happily while eating until they noticed Butters, Tweek and Pip were standing next to the table.

"Um…hello fellas." Butters said. "Mind if we sit with you?" Craig looked up and frowned.

"You can't sit with us, Melvins! Now go away!" He exclaimed, giving them the bird which he often did to people, sometimes for no reason at all.

"Okay…" Butters sighed and he walked away together with his friends. When they walked away, Stan noticed the girls sitting at a table not far away. He smiled sheepishly when he saw Wendy laughing and twirling her hair. Katie, Rebecca and Bebe sat with her, and they were laughing as well. The boys quietly stared at Stan as he just sat there, gazing goofily.

"Dude?" Kyle mumbled, waving his hand in front of Stan's face. Stan looked up. "Seriously, if you like her so much, just ask her out again!" Kyle exclaimed. Stan chuckled a little.

"Look who's talking, mister shy guy's gone rowdy!" Stan replied, making Kyle frown and look back at his food.

The crowd of students storming out of the school once it ended was louder than usual today. Everyone where screaming and shouting out "who-hoo!" all the time. The boys were all too tired to already start walking home, so they sat down on a bench and watched all of the students running out and screaming. After the crowd thinned out, Kenny noticed a group of girls were coming their way. It was all the girls from their class. The boys looked up and saw the girls, and they all smiled a little. Most of the girls stopped and stood in a huddle, watching Wendy and Bebe walk closer up to the boys.

"Hi guys!" Bebe said, waving a little as she smiled at Kenny and bit her lower lip. Kenny waved back, grinning widely. Bebe sat down in his knee and put her arm around his shoulder. "So how are you?"

"Now that you're here, everything's great!" Kenny said, putting on his best smile. Bebe seemed pleased and the two suddenly started making out. Cartman and Kyle moved away from the two a little, irritated. Wendy looked at Stan, her hands behind her back.

"So, how's it going?" She wondered.

"Um…uh…well…" Stan said, his belly tingling insanely, nervousness sweeping over him. "Just fine, just f-f-fine." Wendy smiled and then looked at Cartman.

"Well, Eric, you look great! Where have you been all the time?" She exclaimed. She suddenly hugged him, but no one was really surprised. That was just the way Wendy was, always smiling and hugging her friends and people she cared about.

"Training, getting into shape…" Cartman answered, trying not to throw up. The sting was crawling around his chest like mad, his stomach starting to rage. Wendy nodded, smiling.

"Well, it certainly was worth it!" Cartman smiled and placed his elbow on the side of the bench, knocking down his backpack in the process. All his stuff fell out of it, including the picture of the girl very similar to Wendy herself. Cartman quickly got his stuff and put it in his backpack, but not fast enough. Wendy picked up the drawing and looked at it.

"Wow…this is really good, did you do it?" She said, genuinely surprised as she looked at Cartman. Cartman nodded slowly, his mouth shut tightly. "It's really good…look what Cartman did, Bebe!" She held up the picture in front of Bebe, and she tore herself away from Kenny, who continued to kiss the air. Bebe looked at the picture and a grin crept onto her face, the same suspicious look as before.

"Yeah, nice." She said and then gave Kenny a last kiss before standing up. "We should get going. Bye, Kenny." Bebe said, walking away with Wendy. Wendy waved to the boys and once the two girls joined the others, they all started giggling and whispering to each other.

"Dude, seriously, she is hot. Goddamn it, she is so frickin' hot!" Kenny exclaimed, watching the girls walk off. "Let's go after them!" He stood up, his energy regenerated.

"Kenny…" Kyle groaned, his head falling back.

"Don't you Kenny me! Let's go, come on! Come on, come on!" Kenny exclaimed, jumping up and down like a little kid demanding to get to open his birthday presents.

"Not now, Kenny…" Cartman mumbled, sighing. Kenny stopped jumping up and down and sunk his head down, saddened.

"Goddamn it…nookie or friends…nookie or friends…" He mumbled, turning back and forth, unsure if he should stay with his friends or go after Bebe. He sighed and sat down on the bench. "Goddamn you stupid nookie-haters…what's wrong with you, are you fags or something?" He wondered, glaring at his friends. They didn't return the glare; they merely stared at into the nothingness out of boredom. "Nookie!" Kenny exclaimed, waving his arms.

Wendy and Bebe turned right on the corner and left the other girls. Bebe giggled and put her hands in front of her mouth. Wendy looked at Bebe in wonder. "What's so funny?"

"The drawing."

"What drawing?"

"The one Cartman drew."

"His name is Eric." Wendy remarked, putting her hands at her sides. "And what's so funny about the drawing? It was really nice!"

"Yeah, and it was also a drawing of you." Bebe said, grinning.

"Huh?"

"Are you blind? Cartman's totally got a thing for you! I mean, he starts sweating every time you come anywhere close to him and, like, he's drawing pictures of you and making little love poems and stuff…he's totally got a crush on you, like, huge crush." Bebe explained, twirling her hair and putting her other hand in her pocket. Wendy laughed a little.

"Are you sure we're talking about the same Eric?" She said sarcastically. "He's emotionally immobile. He always used to call me a bitch and a hoe, and it's not like he's all that nice to me now either…" Wendy said, and she frowned, suddenly realizing why she had never been very fond of Cartman. But still, she had always cared about him…she figured she was the same sort of friend to Cartman as Kyle; they always called each other bad things and fought, but they also were around for each other when they needed a friend the most.

"Whatever, don't believe me…" Bebe said, shrugging. Wendy shook her head, sighing.

"I'll do just that."

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Done. Finito. Done. And if you don't know what the title means, you should 'read between the lines'. 


	8. Money, Hoes And Parties: Misplaced

I don't have time to say much right now, so here's the not so highly anticipated and last one for a while chapter eight!

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**Chapter Eight: Money, Hoes And Parties: All Misplaced**

"Leave me alone, Clara…please, just for a moment…" Kenny mumbled as rolled to the other half of his small bed as his little sister tugged on his shirt sleeve.

"But Kenny, I wanna go now!" Clara exclaimed. She had short, red hair like her mother and wore a green, rugged old shirt together with a red skirt. She was a bit dirty and under her left elbow was a scar. She was thirteen years old and pretty smart, unlike Kenny's brother Kevin. Kenny wore a white shirt and blue jeans that kept him warm while he slept, since their on-the-verge-of-falling-apart house didn't have any heat in it at all. Kenny finally got up and went downstairs with her sister, rubbing his eyes all the way. She pulled him straight to the door and out of the green, old house. They went out on the street of the poverty struck part of South Park. All the buildings were pretty much falling apart, and the people walking around looked like they already had. Kenny and Clara walked down the street, Clara a little ahead and holding Kenny's arm tightly all the time. He knew where they were going; every morning for the last four days, she had been doing this. They finally got to the central part of South Park, around where Stan, Cartman, Kyle and all the others lived. They stopped in front of a red house with blue doors. It looked like every other house around, except there was no garage.

"Okay, we're here now!" Kenny exclaimed, stopping. Clara pointed at the sign standing in front of the house. It said 'For Sale-10000$-Call 1-642-327 if you are interested'. Kenny knew why Clara had been taking him here lately. She had found out about the money he had gotten from the bet, and now she wanted to take advantage of it too. But Kenny couldn't blame her; her idea for using the money was pretty much the same as his; to finally be liberated from his parent's verbal and physical abuse, his father's drunken rampages, and their constant fights which always ended in an object hitting Kenny's head causing several bleeding injuries and such. And taking both Kevin and Clara with him would of course be an option, since they were also sick of having to endure their parent's rage at each other. But they had it harder than Kenny, not being able to go to school and not having any friends. At least Kenny could go to Cartman's place if he wanted food and a warm place to sleep, Kevin and Clara had nowhere to run.

"I still don't have enough money." Kenny said, sighing. Clara nodded.

"I know." And then she turned around and headed back home. Kenny figured he would have to go to school soon anyway, so he walked the other direction of the street.

T-T-

"Well, you're early, Kenny." Stan said as he arrived at the bus stop. There were only a few others there, Mark, Kevin and Timmy. Timmy seemed to be sleeping, his head resting on his shoulder, but one of his eyelids was opened a little. For the day, Stan had picked out his navy blue shirt and black button-shirt over it, black jeans and a brown coat that was wrapped around him to shield from the horrendous cold. Kenny looked up. He was leaning sitting in the snow, leaning against the bus stop sign.

"Yeah, my sister dragged me out again…figured I might as well go here…" Kenny told. Stan nodded.

"The house thing again?"

"Yeah." The two fell silent, Stan not sure what to say and Kenny just plain tired. The silence was broken as Kyle came running over the street, however. He wore dark green pants, a white shirt and a blue jacket, his beanie on his head.

"Hey! Hey you guys!" Kyle exclaimed as he ran over to them. "Check it out! Check it out!" He held up a card to them and grinned widely. "I got it in my mail yesterday!" Stan and Kenny looked at the card.

_'Kyle Broflovski, you have been invited to my birthday party the 22nd October._

_Sincerely, Wendy Testaburger. Hope to see you there!_

_PS. Don't worry about the late invitation, no presents!'_ The card read.

"Hey, how come she invited you and not me! We were together for like, months!" Stan exclaimed, a bit hurt. Kenny shrugged.

"Don't be so worried, she'll probably invite you…" He muttered. Stan sighed and then shrugged as well. Kenny looked up as he saw Cartman arriving. "Hey dude." For the day, Cartman had chosen to wear his old, red coat and brown pants. His brown hair was messy and hadn't been taken care of properly.

"Hey, guys." Cartman said as he positioned himself next to Kenny. He looked at Kyle, who was still staring at the card. "What's that?"

"An invitation to Wendy's birthday party! Oh man, Rebecca's probably gonna be there!" Kyle said, lowering his voice so Rebecca's brother, Mark, wouldn't hear him. Cartman's eyes widened.

"You're invited to Wendy Testaburger's birthday party?" He said, a bit surprised.

"Yeah!" Cartman nodded a little as Kyle grinned widely, still not able to divert his eyes from the card. Kenny was about to say something, but he was interrupted by the screeching tires of the bus that had made a complete stop right in front of them.

"…whoa." Was all that escaped Kenny's mouth as the door opened and all the kids walked onto the bus.

"Yes!" Stan shut his locker while waving a card similar to Kyle's, although blue. "I got invited too!" He exclaimed, showing the card to his friends. Kenny sighed.

"Oh, wow, Stan. Practically everyone in class and even more got invited…even Butters got invited." Kenny said, nodding against Butters who passed by. He was trembling heavily, his eyes glued onto his card. Stan shrugged.

"Whatever, as long as I got invited at all." He answered. "Come on, we're gonna be late for class."

T-T-

Cartman sighed for what seemed like the thousand time, staring at his card that Bebe had handed to him during lunch. They were leaving the school at the moment, and everyone but him seemed happy. "Oh man, I can't wait till Saturday…" Stan said, also for what seemed like the thousand time.

"Yeah, well, you're not the only one." Kenny grinned as the boys turned on the road.

T-T-

"Hey Wendy, remembered what I told you earlier?"

"For the last time, Bebe, Eric does not have a crush on me, Jesus!" Wendy said, for what too seemed like the thousand time.

"Well, even though you don't wanna believe me…I'm gonna find out. Don't you want to?" The two girls were walking down the street. Wendy seemed hesitant at first, but then she sighed. "Okay, good, 'cause I got this great plan! See, you know about spin the bottle-truth or dare right? Well," Bebe leaned closer to Wendy and lowered her voice, "we could do this…"

T-T-

Saturday slowly approached. The hype that had built up for the party seemed to have slowed down the passing of the days, only putting on extra weight on it. But when the day came, everyone was too excited to care.

The boys had met up to go to the party together. Stan had put on his black jeans, his white shirt and black vest, and even though he was freezing on the outside, his inside was burning incredibly. Kyle had dressed in his dark green pants, orange shirt and green vest. Kenny wore his denim jacket and white shirt together with his newly washed jeans. Cartman wore a pair of black pants, a white shirt and a black jacket. When the boys finally arrived at the address written down on the cards, they realized it wasn't Wendy's house the party was at. They hadn't even noticed they were in the wealthier parts of South Park, and when they looked up, they instantly figured out Token's parents had rented out their house to Wendy for the night. The windows were lit up by the disco lights flying around on the inside, and silhouettes were seen dancing. Screams and laughter was heard from inside the huge, yellow mansion.

"Awesome!" Kyle exclaimed as the boys walked over to the front doors and pulled them open, entering. The party wasn't as crowded as Craig's, but it was still quite populated. On one side of the entrance, people were dancing and having fun. On the other side, people were sitting on the couches, kissing and being awfully intimate for a public view. Suddenly, a voice banged through the house.

"Everyone in Wendy Testaburger's class, report to the third door to the left on the fourth floor! And Craig, thank you for the megaphone!" The boys heard a faint "your welcome" from the dancing crowd before they sped up the stairs.

T-T-

"Welcome, welcome." The boys were quite surprised to see Butters standing outside the mentioned room, letting people in after checking who they were. He smiled at the boys and waved for them to enter, and they did as told. The room was dark; there was only a light from the middle of the room. They noticed most of their class was sitting in the circle around the lamp positioned on a spinner hanging low from the ceiling. Butters closed the door, and together with the four boys, completed the circle.

"Thank you all for coming to my birthday party!" Wendy said, grinning widely. She was wearing a green tank top and blue jeans. Stan noticed she glanced at him for a second. "What I wanted you to come here for," she shot a mischievous look at Bebe, who wore a red, thin, tank top and blue jeans, "was because we're going to play a little game. Afterwards, you're free to go and party!" There were a few cheers heard from the circle.

"Go, go!" Craig exclaimed, sitting between Wendy and Clyde.

"Okay, okay. Don't freakin' rush me, it's my birthday party. Anyway, the game we're gonna play is a mix of truth or dare and spin the bottle…it goes like this; I'll start by spinning the bottle twice. The first one to be chosen is going to be handed two options; a specific dare for the second one chosen or a specific truth, which are both going to be on a card. If its dare, well, you know what to do. If its truth, the one asked has to, and I mean, HAS TO answer…I got a nice bouncer guarding the door, so don't bother trying to run. Thank you, Donny, by the way." A grunt was heard from the door, although no one could see Donny. "Okay, let's begin! Bottle, please." Bebe handed her a bottle, and Wendy placed it precisely in the middle of the circle.

"Here we go!" Butters exclaimed as the bottle spun. It stopped first on Katie, and then on Kyle.

"We'll start with something low profile…" Wendy said as she handed Katie a card. Katie sighed with relief as she read the card.

"I choose dare." She then walked over to Kyle and gave him a light peck on the cheek. Afterwards, she sat down on her original place.

"Okay, that was nice and cute. Now, Kyle, you spin the bottle." Wendy smiled. Kyle looked around; he smiled when he noticed Rebecca sitting five people away, wearing a green, knee-long skirt and a red shirt. He then spun the bottle and crawled back. It stopped first on Token, and then on Clyde. Token read the card, and his face twisted in disgust.

"Um, I definitely choose truth. Clyde, who here do you most want to kiss?" Everyone looked at Clyde expectedly, and without a single sign of shame or embarrassment, he answered,

"Bebe." A series of "ooooh" 's were heard, and for a moment, Kenny looked as if he was about to throw a tantrum. However, he played cool and calmed down. Clyde then spun the bottle. It slowed down on Wendy…and then, on Rebecca.

"Okay, Rebecca, I choose truth; who here do you want…to get intimate with the most?"Wendy said with a playful yet mischievous smile on her face. Rebecca seemed to blush a little.

"K…Kyle?" Everyone gasped and "oooh"'ed, some even applauded. She quickly spun the bottle and stared down at her knees. It stopped on Bebe and then on Stan. Bebe read the card and gave Stan a very odd look. Then, she smiled and crept over to him. He seemed completely stiff as she gave him a light push. He fell backwards on his back on the floor and his eyes widened as he got on to him and gave him a kiss. He felt her tongue wrestle with his for a moment, and he felt shocked, yet almost pleased. She then got up and sat back down next to Wendy. Wendy seemed a little jealous, but she was still as happy as always.

"Okay, next!" Stan got up, a goofy and still shocked look on his face, his other eyelid hanging. He then snapped back into reality and spun the bottle. It slowed down and stopped first on Kenny…and then…on…Cartman. Even louder cheers were heard as Kenny looked at the card Bebe handed him. Cartman stared at him confused; what was Kenny going to do?

Kenny panicked in his mind as he read the card. 'Truth: Who do you like/have a crush on/love here? Dare: Give the second chosen one a kiss for thirty seconds…with tongue.' Kenny looked from the card to Cartman, his panic growing. Everyone started ushering him, telling him to hurry up.

"Come on!" Wendy exclaimed. Kenny looked from her to Bebe to Stan to Kyle and then over the rest of the teenagers. He then stared at Cartman, and then, after taking a deep breath and closing his eyes, he walked over to Cartman. Cartman winced as Kenny suddenly gave him a kiss. Everyone gasped, shocked as they watched the two kiss. Cartman's eyes were wide open as he felt Kenny's tongue in his own mouth, and he was too shocked to push away. Kenny finally let go and got back into his seat. However, he quickly got up and walked over to some dark corner of the room. For a moment¸ there was only silence. Then, the sound of splatter was heard and they heard Kenny curse. Cartman got up and walked over to a corner as well, and the same sounds were heard again.

"Whoa…" Stan gasped, still gaping like many others in the room. "Did that seriously just happen?"

"I think it did." Kyle mumbled as Cartman and Kenny got back into their seats, both looking pale and with dark frowns on their faces.

"That is just fucked up right there." Stan said.

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Dun-dun-dun-duuun! Yup, cliffy for you! Kind of anticlimatic, isn't it? Well, hope you all loved it, see you later! 


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